Why I’m Not Influenced By Influencers

It is funny to me that we live in a world that is so influenced by the outer world, more specifically by social media platforms. Oftentimes, people will find complete strangers and people that they do not know in real life to follow their every move. If this influencer buys a certain product, then the follower is more inclined to purchase it too. This is why there is a lot of money to be made if you are an influencer with an abundant following because companies know that their followers will most likely purchase what they promote. It is for this reason, I do not really buy into what influencers are promoting. Most of them are selling products to earn an income so who really knows if they use these products or are just talking about them to make a living.

There is nothing wrong with following people and having an interest in what influencers post on social media; however, I think people should work on their own self development and think more independently as opposed to caring so much about what others are sharing. As I mentioned previously, it is hard to really know if they are sharing content to make money or from a genuine place. It is much better to follow your natural inclinations and to think for yourself than to put all your energy into what other people are doing. Think about what your goals are and what makes you happy because that is ultimately what counts most above anything else. At the end of the day, be your own influencer and stay true to your values, desires, and path.

Can Open Relationships Work?

The concept of an “open relationship” on the surface comes off as an oxymoron to me. When I think of the word relationship, I associate that to entail commitment, loyalty, and togetherness. If you are in a healthy relationship, I would imagine that means that two people are mutually dedicated to each other and the greater good of their relationship. If someone were to propose the idea of having an open relationship–my response would simply be, “Nice knowing you!” In other words, I would terminate the relationship at that point because I look at a relationship as all or nothing. If someone is not going to choose to only be with me and wants to keep their options open, that is not the relationship for me personally. I just do not see the point of that; however, at the same time, I do not like to judge others who have different viewpoints or expectations within their personal relationships because what works for me might not work for someone else.

If you are casually dating someone and it has not been established that both people are in a committed relationship, then by all means, keeping it “open” is acceptable because it is understood by both parties that the relationship is not a serious one or perhaps both people are taking a slower dating approach just to ensure that the connection is genuinely there. In those types of scenarios, I actually encourage people to keep their dating options open and to not overly invest in one person if it is casual because sometimes you have to explore what’s out there before making a commitment to someone and it is wiser to take your time in getting to know the person rather than rushing into a relationship immediately. Women tend to rush into relationships with the agenda of getting married and having children without actually determining if the man is a compatible match and suited for their future which is why you often see women asking for divorces down the line. This is why I believe it is better to take things slow and to not push for relationships until establishing a strong bond and confirming that the feelings are both mutual.

Now the real question is, if you are in a serious relationship or perhaps even married, can an open relationship work out while keeping the initial relationship in the long run? The simple yet not so simple answer is: Yes and No. Yes–it can absolutely work if you have two people totally on the same page with this arrangement. It is possible that both parties agree with keeping it open. However, it has to be equal where both people want the open relationship and NOT one sided where one person asked the other person for an open relationship and the other person felt obligated and settled on this arrangement against their will or for the sake of saving their current relationship. It also is not equal if one person can be in an open relationship but expects the other person to stay totally committed and are not allowed to pursue the same arrangement. While I think it is rare and often can ultimately create problems down the line for the couple, every relationship is situational in that maybe this can work for some people. Again, it can work when two people are on board with it but if you have people who have mixed feelings in regards to how they feel about having an open relationship, that is when you have trouble in paradise. It is for this reason that the best solution is to avoid this arrangement in its entirety or maybe this is a time to reflect whether or not it is time to break up and/or pursue a new relationship altogether.

Abundance Is A Mindset

I am actually typing from my cell phone right now because I am away on vacation but I came across this at a boutique and wanted to share this simple yet powerful message: “Abundance is a mindset.”

I couldn’t agree more with this statement! When I reflect upon my own life and feel a heightened sense of gratitude in regards to everything I have manifested and have attracted at this stage of my life, it is apparent that I have a positive outlook along with a deep spiritual connection with the Universe.

I often preach about having an abundance mindset within my blog because I truly believe we live in a world with unlimited resources and opportunities. In order to receive, it is essential that you trust the process and believe that everything you desire is on the way and that it is attainable. If you have doubts or don’t think that your desires are actual possibilities, then you will never manifest your very best life. Trust me, if you keep your mind abundant, everything does fall into place at the right time in your life so don’t ever let negativity get in the way of that.

The Truth About Youth And Why Life Should Only Get Better With Age

We live in a society that is obsessed with youth. Whether you are consciously aware of it or you are not, there is no denying that people want to stay young and that there are many out there who get depressed at the thought of aging. While celebrating a birthday should be seen as a happy milestone each year, as people get older, there are many who do not view it this way and do not enjoy acknowledging that they are getting older. While it is understanding up to a point why people feel this way, I am here to remind you that this is not the right mindset to have! I remember talking to someone awhile ago about this subject and the person was saying that people should be grateful for each year that they get to live and embrace the physical changes that come along with that because there are some people that never get that opportunity to experience aging because they passed at a young age. This was something that stuck with me because this is all very true. We all need to appreciate our lives today because there is never a guarantee that there is a tomorrow.

On a brighter note, I want to share my mindset when it comes to aging: Life should only get better with age. What I mean by that is that as we get older, we should have collected more life experiences along with heightening our very own self development. These are both great spiritual assets that are often not received until much later in life. When I look back on my youth, while I might have appeared to be at the “prime” of my life; I did not have as much then as I do today. I would still choose to be where I am at the present moment rather than wishing I could go back to my younger days because life is always moving forward and day by day, I am continuing to progress. While being younger might have its perks, the truth comes back to my mindset that life gets better with age! Remember that if you choose to think this way, you will be able to manifest much more abundance into your life and attract the positive experiences that you have yet to live! It is all coming your way if you believe that the very best is in your FUTURE and that “the best is yet to come!” 😉

Why Practicing Generosity Matters In This World

When I think about some of the most desirable traits to possess, one of the first things that always comes to mind is generosity or simply the act of being generous. When I use the word “generous,” I do not want anyone to interpret that to solely mean someone who gives an exorbitant amount of money to charity or someone who has the money to buy lavish gifts on a regular basis. While the act of generosity is often associated with money, practicing it can be done so on a regular basis and in very small ways that still can make a lasting impact on others. It does not need to be a grand gesture at all times and even the smallest of gestures can still be rather significant.

Being that this is something that I highly value, in the back of my mind, I try to proactively make this a habit. When you are generous towards other people, you are not only showing your appreciation but also making the other person feel good inside which ultimately makes you feel good in return. It is a win win situation in my book because it not only uplifts the other person but it can fulfill your soul with positivity. It is for this reason that I associate generosity with good karma. Do you want to attract good karma in your life? Then consider finding ways in which you can practice generosity. I also find that when people are generous towards me, it promotes me to want to reciprocate and be extra generous in return. While some people will take advantage and take from people who like to give, it is good to be cautious of people with these behaviors because people with a “taker” mentality tend to never change. However, sometimes people can learn from other people who give and slowly develop it into a habit as well.

From a spiritual standpoint, I truly believe that in order to attract more abundance, generous gestures and the act of giving are essential because there is so much to go around in the Universe–one should never have to worry that there will be a shortage of anything. If you are constantly holding back and taking from others as opposed to giving, this comes from a scarcity mindset that there are not enough resources. It is always far more superior to give more than you take because we live in an abundant world with lots to go around for everyone. Aside from money, time is also a spiritual gift that you can choose to give to someone generously. So if you genuinely feel that your financial resources are tight at the moment, remember that there are plenty of other ways to be generous that do not have a monetary value. All that matters is that you are making the effort to practice generosity because oftentimes, it will not go unnoticed and you could be making a positive difference in someone else’s life–especially someone who is less fortunate than you are.

Have a Great Week! :)

I have been super busier than usual this summer and quite honestly, I couldn’t find the time to write a real post this week but I’ll be back soon and until then, I am just wishing everyone a great week! 🙂

A quick look at July 4th in NYC this year!

How to Avoid Toxic Relationships in Its Entirety

In the dating world, while most people opt for relationships that are full of happiness and bliss, the reality is that sometimes relationships are far from healthy and end up becoming extremely toxic. What is a toxic relationship? I would describe a toxic relationship as one that is emotionally draining and consistently problematic. It is normal that couples will argue from time to time but when it happens the majority of the time and the relationship brings more negativity than positivity, I would say that this would be labeled as a toxic relationship. It is easy to fall into a toxic relationship without even realizing it and to keep continuing it for the sake of saving it. However, honestly–these relationships are NOT worth saving and should be avoided at all costs. The real question is, how?

It is important to be consciously aware of when a relationship is taking a turn for the worst or when you start picking up on a series of red flags. As soon as you notice bad behavior or any sign of disrespect, this is your exit ticket to not just walk but to RUN–aka terminate the relationship immediately. The reason it is important to do this as soon as possible is to prevent yourself from developing any deep attachment or strong feelings for the other person and vice versa. If very little time was invested, it is much easier for both people to move on as opposed to walking away from a relationship that lasted for many years. By terminating the relationship, I also want to make it clear that this also means NO CONTACT. I understand for some, that this can be an extremely difficult process because it is reasonable to want to connect and see how someone that you once cared about is doing or to perhaps maintain some sort of friendship. Listen, I get that up to a point. However, let me ask you this–why would you proactively choose to keep someone toxic in your life still? Does toxicity provide any spiritual value in your life or anyone’s life for that matter? I surely hope the answer is NO because that is the correct answer. As soon as you determine at the early stages of the relationship that it has the potential to become toxic, do not hesitate to end it altogether. You are doing everyone a favor by creating the space that is needed for both people to move on and to pursue a better future for themselves without the other person.

Now if you were in a long term relationship with someone for many years and it was rather good in the beginning but then a series of events allowed for the relationship to become toxic over time, I strongly believe that ending the relationship is still your best case scenario. Do not forget that you are always in control of your future and that if you genuinely want to create a brighter one that it is up to YOU to do that–and no one else’s. Things might have been great in the past but if your current partner is causing any added stress, grief, aggravation, and/or other negative impact onto your life, you need to recognize that this is NOT the person for you anymore and that it is time to move on. You not only deserve better but there is a much more suitable match out there for you if you are receptive to that train of thought. As sad as it might feel to give up on a relationship that once brought you joy, it is okay to do so and a far more superior decision in the long run–even if you do not feel or think that way at the present moment. Sometimes you have to close a door in order for the right door to open with a better opportunity. Remember that this spiritual concept applies to most things in life including your personal relationships.

You Can Be Both Smart AND Beautiful – You Can Actually Be ANYTHING

Sometimes you hear people say that people can either be intelligent or attractive but why can’t people CHOOSE to be both? I emphasize the word “choose” because it is up to us as individuals to determine what our best qualities are. Even if other people might not perceive you to be a certain way, what ultimately matters most is how you perceive yourself. For example, you might not be someone’s type look wise but does that mean that you are not attractive? Absolutely NOT! Of course you are! The key is to train your mindset to truly believe that you are! 😉 Remember that your thoughts do become things so if you believe that you are a certain way, then you will possess these qualities because your mind determined that they are indeed factual. This goes for intelligence and pretty much any desirable quality that is out there. Just because someone doesn’t classify you a certain way, that should not be an indicator of your authentic being.

When prevents people from being the best version of themselves is a weak mindset paired with a lack of confidence. If you recognize that you do not think very highly of yourself, the good news is that there are ways to change that and like most things in life, it is never too late to start! The best way to change your outlook is to create positive affirmations for yourself. These can be written down on index cards and read aloud as a reminder. This might sound like a silly thing to do but that is how manifestation works is by repetition and a strong focus on a desired outcome. It is amazing that when you are consistent and persistent, the internal work that you put into your self development actually transforms into a reality. Ultimately you can be ANYTHING that you want to be as long as you are in control of your mind and you are always striving to be the best that you can be! 🙂

3 Subtle Ways to Convey Interest in Another Person

While there are many different approaches when it comes to building attraction and to signal to someone that you are interested in them, sometimes a subtle approach can be the best way to go about it. Everything is situational and there are many factors to consider such as how long you have known the person and where you met them. Of course there are certain scenarios where a subtle approach wouldn’t get you very far or it is a lost cause altogether to express interest because they could be taken or just never develop the same feelings in return. However, that is why it is a safe way to go about it and there is really nothing to lose.

Eye Contact – While most people naturally make eye contact when they speak to others, I think that it also is more likely to happen naturally when one is attracted to someone else which is why it is a good idea to lock eyes with someone that is of interest to you. Eventually the other person will tend to notice if it is a person whom you see on a regular basis. From there, it will become easier for someone to “make a move” so to speak because both people have already established a connection through their body language.

Initiate a Connection – Eye contact is helpful but won’t get you very far if you rely on strictly eye contact alone. In addition, it could come off as creepy to some people if one is making eye contact on a regular basis but then never saying a word. By initiating a connection, that could be done in different ways. I would say the easiest is to strike up a light conversation. It does not need to be anything too deep or meaningful from the start. It could be very casual. This will also help in determining if there is any type of spiritual connection based upon the conversations. Attraction is a funny thing where you might feel that way about someone from a physical standpoint but then as soon as you talk to the person, you recognize that there is absolutely nothing there to take the attraction any further.

Consistent Interactions – I truly believe that consistency can go a very long way when it comes to building attraction. It is important to be consistent because like anything in life, consistency is bound to lead to results and success over time. Even if the other person is not necessarily as interested or perhaps is not aware that there is any interest on your end, over time this person will probably pick up the cues and most likely start to develop feelings along the way in return as long as the interactions are positive and polite. So remember to be patient but also very consistent with your actions or in this case, your interactions with the other person.

Why Having the Same Boundaries and Values in a Relationship Are Important

While there are many factors involved as to why many relationships fall apart over time, I do believe that when two people are on the same page with their personal boundaries and possess the same value system, there is a much higher chance that the relationship will last for the long haul. In any relationship, it is essential to have those deep conversations with one another to ensure that both people think and feel the same about both the small things and more important aspects of a relationship. For example, how does the other person feel about cheating? How often does the person like to be in communication throughout the day? What is their preferred method of communication? While not every single answer has to be the same as yours, at the very least, it is good to know the answers to these questions. Aside from knowing this information to better understand one another, this will also help in determining how compatible you are with someone. If you recognize that there are a good amount of differences when it comes to your values and boundaries, that might be a good time to reassess the relationship and decide if it is the right one for you or not.

I think that this is often overlooked due to a lack of communication and open dialogue but issues do arise over time from these differences. It is okay to ask questions and to find out how your partner feels regarding things that are important to you. It is also healthy and appropriate to express what your personal boundaries and values are. If the other person is not on board with them, take that as a cue to move on. Remember that the right person would not only respect your boundaries but they would also have no problem honoring them.