I know I have written a blog similar to this subject matter before and it is something that is especially helpful to read, especially if you are a parent or a parent to be. Although I am not a parent, I understand what an important job it is and that it is a role that should not be taken lightly. I also recognize that everyone has a very different approach to parenting and what might work on one child might not work out so well on another. So of course, parenting is a very personal role and one has to tailor the job to their particular child.
No matter what your parenting style is, I think that most would agree that it is important to build confidence in children so that they grow up to be strong and independent adults. People tend to think that telling their kids that they are the best at everything and teaching them to believe that they are flawless is helping their kids. Let’s be real for a moment–No one is flawless. Everyone is born with skills and talents but no one is good at everything in every area in life. Think about it, if someone was told that they are already exceptional at something, then there is little room to find improvements or to grow. It is OKAY to not be good at something and to point this out to a child or to anyone because this can motivate the person to want to get better and to strive to be a better person.
As a child, my parents had no problem telling me that I was not good at something and that I needed to improve. Maybe in the short term, I might feel upset inside but in the long term, my confidence was set up in a position that in order to elevate my self esteem, I needed to find ways to overcome these challenges. It is kind of like starting from the bottom of the mountain and then climbing to the top. What a wonderful feeling it is (aka a boost of confidence) once you actually get to the top! If one already started at the top of a mountain, then you would just stay there doing nothing because you would have no where else to climb any higher. This also creates a false sense of reality because most things in life require some work in which one needs to start at the very bottom. No one just automatically starts at the top because again, there is no room for growth and one needs to embrace the challenges along the way in order to get to the top to build strength which ultimately generates confidence.