Category Archives: Attraction

Do Compliments Build Attraction? – (Yes and No)

When people take the time to give a compliment, it typically is received positively by the other person because it is acknowledging something great about them and is a way to express admiration. I would say that most of the time, compliments are a good thing and can definitely be used to build attraction because most people feel good when someone gives them a compliment. People tend to become attracted to those who give them a good feeling about themselves. So the short answer is, yes–compliments can absolutely help in building attraction. However, there are definitely instances in which it might have little to no effect on someone or maybe even have the opposite effect.

If someone receives a compliment from someone who they do not think too highly of or don’t really like, then the person might not even care so much about it or might actually be annoyed by it. I say annoyed because if the person feels that the other is saying it to express interest and the interest is not mutual, then the compliment will not be viewed in a positive light. In these type of scenarios, I would say that it is not really worth going out of your way to compliment the person and that it is important to find other ways to build a genuine connection or perhaps find someone whom you naturally connect with instead of trying to impress someone who is not that into you from the start.

In addition, people who are used to hearing the same compliments throughout their lives might feel indifferent towards a compliment because it is nothing new to them. For example, if someone is a talented musician, telling them this does not hold too much value because they might already know this to be the case or they just hear it all the time so it is not very special to them. On the other hand, if you find a way to validate the person for something that people don’t comment on all the time, then your compliment will go a long way.

Overall, compliments are definitely a good thing and can be used as a way to signal interest in someone but keep in mind that sometimes a compliment simply is just a compliment–so one should not read too into it and just take it at face value. If one is trying to use this technique as a way to get someone interested in them, it is important to not rely on this tactic alone and to find other ways to create natural attraction. I always like to remind people that what works on one person might not work as successfully on someone else so it is important to make an effort to get to know someone on a deeper level in order to really understand someone’s likes and dislikes.

5 Signs You’re Not With the Right Partner

When looking for a life partner, there may come times when you question whether or not you should stay in your current relationship. Although I can probably think of a more extensive list as to signs to look for when determining if it’s time to end a relationship, I came up with my top five list. The list below should help you to decide if the relationship is worth pursuing or whether or not it is meant to last over time.

There Are Way Too Many Things to Fix – If you find that you’re with someone who you want to change many things about them, this person simply is not the one. Of course the person you are with will not possess everything you are looking for; however, if the person is missing many things that you’re looking for in a life partner then you should consider moving on because ideally you want to be with someone who you can accept the person for who they are including both their good and bad traits. For example, if you can’t stand their eating habits or how they manage their money, rather than trying to change them, find a person who is more aligned with how you choose to live your life. Why settle on a “fixer upper relationship” where you constantly have to change the person and shape them into your dream partner? It just isn’t worth it! I have a better idea: Why don’t you break it off for good and keep the door open for your dream partner to come into your life?

Your Partner Is Not Over Their Ex – For me personally, this is a huge deal breaker. Think about it, why waste your time dating someone who can’t stop talking about their past and is not completely over their ex? You should want to build a future with someone who is fully in the present with you and doesn’t have a lingering past that they are still currently living in. If you notice that the person you are with does not seem to have healed from their last relationship, rather than continuing to date in hopes that they will get over their ex over time, it probably is best to not invest any of your time with this person until you know that they are ready to move forward.

Lack of Trust – I think it goes without saying that you should not be with someone who you do not trust or has betrayed your trust at some point during the course of your relationship. Although you might be able to forgive and forget, it is often tough to totally trust the person again depending on the depth of deception. I also want to point out, if the person has trust issues against you with no real justification for it, this is another indication that it is not worth it to stay because you will constantly have to walk on eggshells to prove that you can be trusted which can get really exhausting over time if you’re being challenged on a daily basis.

Other Options In the Back of Your Mind – If the thought of someone else ever comes to your mind or if you would be open to giving your number to a stranger if they asked, you definitely are not with the right person. When you are with the person you truly care about, you wouldn’t look at anyone else in a romantic way. You also would not even consider giving your personal information to someone else because you are happily taken and only have love for the person you are with. If you find that you are open to the idea of spending time with another person who isn’t your partner, that should be a strong indicator that you need to break it off altogether as opposed to settling on someone who isn’t your most desired match.

You Just Don’t See a Future With This Person – Sometimes it can take time to see if your partner’s life and yours can merge into a future together. If you’re at a point where you just don’t see your life paths going in the same direction, then despite how strongly you might feel for this person, it might be better to end the relationship. For example, if your partner only plans to live in a city and you can’t see yourself making this life change, then there is no future unless one can make a compromise. In addition, if you don’t envision yourself being with this person in the next few years, you need to question the reason you feel this way and this feeling might give you the clarity that’s needed to find a better suited life partner that you can actually see a future with.

How Often Should You Count Your Lucky Stars?

I often like to preach the subject of gratitude throughout my blog and it is something I think people either do or they don’t. Some people do it on a more conscious level while for others it can be done more on a subconscious level. For me personally, I believe I do it on a subconscious level on a daily basis. It becomes more of a conscious practice when I recognize that something I wanted to manifest has been received or when I’m in a bad situation where things were not nearly that bad after all and I think to myself, “Wow, I’m incredibly lucky that things weren’t worse than it is.”

So how often should you count your lucky stars? At all times! You should always be thankful for even the smallest of things. As I mentioned, even during bad times or misfortune, take the time to dig deep and find the silver lining along with acknowledging what you are still grateful for. When people complain to me about their life and what they are lacking, I will take the time to listen but then turn it around to all the things that they do have to shift their perception that life isn’t so bad after all. It is okay to vent and it is okay to feel down when things don’t seem to be going your way; however, it is essential to remain positive and know that things are going to get better.

I always like to point out that being grateful attracts more abundance into your life. Do you think it is a coincidence that some people always seem to have everything going for them? Absolutely not. This is not a coincidence, these are the people who are practicing gratitude and are thankful for what they have which allows for them to be in constant receiving mode from the Universe to keep on receiving. It is an amazing spiritual process that anyone can pick up if they possess an abundant mindset that is open to infinite possibilities and opportunities.

I cannot stress enough the importance of counting your lucky stars, in other words, simply being grateful as often as you can! For those who have trouble doing this or find that they naturally complain more than they practice gratitude, then I recommend creating an actual Gratitude journal. Each day, take the time to write some things you are currently grateful for. It can be general like, “I’m thankful for my loving family and good health” or something specific such as, “I am grateful for being given a potential new job opportunity and acing my interview today.” The great thing is, there’s no such thing as a wrong answer and this is totally personal to YOU! You get to choose what resonates most with you and what you are most appreciative of. Once you get into this practice, you might no longer need to physically write things down as it will become a habit over time that will sink into your subconscious mind. Whatever system that works for you, just do it–it’s never too late to start!

“Your Direction Is More Important Than Your Speed”

I actually came across this quote on an Instagram caption and liked it enough to google it first to see that it is an actual quote. The quote is, “Your direction is more important than your speed.” I could not agree more with this. I feel like we live in a world where everything is about instant gratification and everyone is in a rush to get what they want right now. What people do not understand is, many amazing things take time and the process should NOT be rushed. What is the point in moving fast when you’re not going in the right direction?

There needs to be a greater focus on DIRECTION. As we all know, life can go in many directions. Where do you want to go? Is your life going in that direction? From there, if you are following that path, you need to trust that you will get to the end result or achieve that goal. Once I commit to the direction that I am going, there is no need to be asking “when” because I know that I am on my right path and understand that everything that I desire to manifest most will happen…when it is supposed to. People often stress over time and not having what they want at the time that they want; however, that has the opposite effect on your outcome. Why? Stress and lack of trust are both negative energies to put out into the Universe. Positive energy requires CERTAINTY (again trust) on your end along with PATIENCE (not worrying on the speed in which it happens).

I recognize that certain things in life require deadlines and that can be expected. However, also keep in mind that not everything has to have a deadline. As I said before, many of the greatest things in life do indeed take time. The process in getting there is even more enjoyable when you take the time to actually appreciate it as opposed to rushing to the finish line.

Why Modesty Is Attractive and How to Practice It

I find modesty to be an incredibly admirable and attractive quality to possess and something that people should really try to practice more. Why? When someone is modest, they are not showy (aka a show off) and do not find the need to boast or brag about anything. I also truly believe that most people who are modest genuinely have a strong inner confidence and self assurance about them. Think about it, if a person is smart or good looking or some other desirable trait, they KNOW this already–so why do they need to outward say so? In other words, why state something that is obvious to themselves (and perhaps the outside world)? Whenever I hear someone have to literally state, “I’m really intelligent” or “I’m very successful,” there’s a high chance that this person actually isn’t or doesn’t think other people feel this way about them so they need to sell this idea in hopes that others will buy into it and perceive them as an elevated sense of self even though it is probably far from the reality. The other alternative is that this person feels they are lacking in other areas of self so they only want to focus on boasting about their positive attributes to compensate for what’s missing. Regardless of the underlying reason as to why a person feels the need to brag or show off, it just is NOT attractive nor is it necessary because as I said, people who are modest will not declare their positive qualities so explicitly.

To practice modesty, I recommend being mindful of how you portray yourself to others. I am not saying that you need to hide your achievements or how awesome your life is or that you can never talk up something that you are proud of. Of course it is natural to do this and I encourage you to do so when you feel it is justified; however, it is important to NOT constantly do this because it comes across that you are in constant need of validation or that you just like to brag about everything. In addition, it can sometimes make you appear like a narcissist–which I don’t think anyone finds attractive. A good example of this is when you see someone post a risqué photo on social media. Now on the one hand, if someone is proud about how they look, I don’t have a problem with that whatsoever. However, if these are the only types of photos that this person chooses to post then it just shows that this person not only needs a lot of attention to feel validated but that this person is far from modest. If someone already KNOWS they look good, then there’s no need to constantly sell this to the outside world. They know it, they own it, and they don’t have to over expose themselves to get the point across. Again, this all comes back to the point that it is important to be conscientious of how you display yourself and I don’t mean just physically but in all aspects of your life. You can still be a high value individual without being a show off about it. If you are modest, you actually heighten your value and attraction level because you convey a high confidence level which is always attractive.

“I Always Get What I Want” – A Manifestation Mantra That Works and Here’s Why

When I think about what is stopping people from manifesting their desires, unfortunately, many people possess mental road blocks that get in the way or have a strong disbelief from the start that what they want can actually turn into a reality. People are also very much shaped by their past so if they have had any type of negative experience (ex: a failed marriage, getting fired from a job, etc.) then they might stay emotionally stuck in these moments which makes it incredibly difficult to actually move forward in life.

Despite anything you previously have experienced or any negativity that you might currently be holding on to, the good news is that life very well is always in a state of motion and best of all, you get to control the direction it goes in. So let’s apply a manifestation mantra that will reset your state of mind and guide you in the right direction: “I always get what I want.” I don’t know about you but I do not think it can get any more reassuring than that! By genuinely believing that you always get what you want, you actually are conveying to the Universe that you are deserving, fully capable, and ready to receive everything that your heart desires. On a subconscious level, you will also find that you will automatically do whatever it takes to make it happen while attracting infinite abundance in the areas of your life which you are looking to progress.

What happens when you don’t get something that you wanted? Do you lose hope? Do you then think to yourself, “The Universe failed me.” ABSOLUTELY NOT. Of course there are going to be instances in life where you aren’t presented with what you wanted or you are faced with rejection. That is all part of the journey and life will have its challenges along the way which might leave you feeling discouraged but my counter to this is: Something better is on the horizon. You need to remain focused that you are still in the process of receiving what you want and although it might be taking a very long time–trust me, it is on its way and will be worth it once it is received. It is important to not only trust the process but to be patient with the manifesting process. So please do not develop any doubts in your mind when you don’t receive something immediately, just remember to continue to repeat to yourself: I always get what I want and if it appears to be taking longer than expected, something much better is in the works–you have nothing to worry about! 😉

Self Love Will Always Guide You in the Right Direction in Life

One of the many themes of my blog is the concept of “self love.” I don’t want this to be confused with narcissism because that is something I never encourage but self love is something that everyone should really proactively be trying to build an abundance of. Having a high level of self love develops not only your overall self esteem but also your self worth. When you possess self love and therefore understand your worth, it becomes much easier to make positive life decisions. Besides making better life decisions, you are also elevating your personal standards and heightening your level of respect towards self which are both equally important to your self development.

When people make bad life decisions or ones that are not for the greater good of their own life, the fundamental issue usually stems from their lack of love for self. Think about it, if you love yourself, are you going to choose to be with someone who cheats on you, abandons you, or just generally treats you with disrespect? HECK NO! You better not at least. Why? If you value yourself, you keep your path clear of ever getting into those types of relationships. Once you detect any sign of disrespect, you are up and out because you love yourself enough to know that you are better off being single and happy than to be locked into a toxic relationship that is only bringing your life down.

This applies to all aspects of your life, not just within your personal relationships. Think about your career. Are you going to work for a company where you feel overworked and/or underpaid? Some of you might because you feel the need to in order to survive or don’t believe there are better options (aka a scarcity mindset) but someone with self love is going to make the decision to find another job. Why? This person knows their worth and knows there is something way better out there as opposed to settling on a job that is not fulfilling them both spiritually and financially.

My point is, when you develop a high level of self love, it becomes much easier to make better life decisions because you are always putting yourself first–as you should! There is nothing wrong with that and you are not being selfish for doing so. While of course it is a priority to take care of others such as our family members, friends, and loved ones, please do not ever neglect taking care of yourself. Keep in mind that we also need to take care of ourselves in order to become the best versions of ourselves for the people we care about most.

On a final note, remember that self love will always guide you in the right direction in life by propelling you to make the very best decisions and also know that loving yourself will always lead you to a path of infinite happiness. 🙂 ❤

Do “Nice Guys Finish Last?” – My Advice to Men

There is the common expression that, “nice guys finish last.” Although there might be some truth to this, I don’t believe that this has to be the case for nice men. There is this common misconception that women prefer the so-called bad guys, players, etc. The underlying issue for women who choose these types of men usually stem from either their upbringing (ex: no father figure, poor male role models–aka “daddy issues”) or they on some subconscious level do not believe they are deserving of a good man, more specifically in this case–a nice guy.

My best advice to nice guys is to find a nice girl! There are plenty of nice women out there who are looking for their match and want to be with a nice man. It is up to men to weed out the women who do no respect, love, or treat them like gold. Nice guys will often tolerate bad female behavior and will tend to stick around until they become a doormat to the women who will never supply them with the love that they give so generously. That is why it is essential for a man to know his worth and cut his losses when he is faced with a woman who does not value him. Sadly, you cannot love someone into falling in love with you in return. Usually the opposite will happen where the woman will just be turned off entirely or she may stick around for the wrong reasons.

In addition, there is more to bring to the table in the dating world than just being nice. Women are attracted to nice men but not if these same men have nothing else going on for them other than this attribute. I can’t help but notice that there are many nice men out there who are devoted, committed, loving, and sweet as pie–especially to women; however these are the same men who don’t have a career, steady income, and are living in the basement with mom still. I am not saying ALL nice guys are like this but I do notice a high correlation between nice guys being much less ambitious with little to offer in terms of a lasting relationship with a promising and secure future. This is where men need to work on themselves so that when the right woman comes along, he has more going for him than just being a nice guy. Keep in mind that “working on self” should not be done strictly for increasing value in the dating world but for yourself–with or without a partner. The reason being that by bettering self, you not only will increase your self worth and confidence but you will also radiate an energy that others will naturally find attractive.

5 Ways You Could Be Investing in Yourself Today

I truly believe that the greatest investments are the ones made towards investing in self–whether it be self development or improvement. As wonderful as we build our lives to be, let’s be honest, there is always room for growth and ways to make life even better than it is today. That’s the beauty of life, it is constantly in motion where we are experiencing, creating, learning, and becoming our best versions of self each and every day. This cannot be done unless we make the proactive choice to invest in our selves and thankfully, there are many ways in which we can be doing just that.

Continue to Educate Yourself – Your school days might be long over but that does not mean that learning has to stop forever. There are ways to continue to educate yourself in just about anything so I recommend picking up a self improvement book or taking a course to learn a completely new skill or perhaps improve upon a current skill set. It is never too late pick up a new personal hobby or profession and thanks to places like YouTube, you can also watch videos on just about anything nowadays to learn something new.

Create a Balanced Diet and Exercise Regime – Balance is the key to everything and will most certainly work in your favor when you take the time to invest in your health through both diet and exercise. If you don’t really enjoy working out in a traditional gym, there are still ways you can remain active by finding physical activities you love and staying committed to fitting them into your schedule. In terms of a healthy diet, the best way to really stay on track is to literally track what you eat which will train you to become more conscientious of not only what you are eating but how much you are eating. Remember that it is your personal responsibility to maintain optimal health by making the self investment through both eating well and staying fit.

Expand Your Financial Resources – I labeled this as “expanding your financial resources” because the way in which you go about this can look very different from individual to individual. For one, this could mean working for a big company and working from the bottom up in terms of obtaining a higher position for a company over time. For someone else, it could mean running one or multiple businesses. Another person might go about expanding financial resources by investing in real estate. There are unlimited ways of growing your personal economy in today’s world and this should absolutely be a top priority as a way of possessing financial freedom and security. In addition, by focusing on increasing your wealth, this provides you the opportunity to contribute money towards a retirement fund while also putting money aside for big purchases such as a house, nice car, and/or a dream vacation.

Set Goals and Execute Them – I emphasize goal setting quite often as we should constantly be setting goals for ourselves as a way to create new challenges and to hold ourselves accountable for placing higher expectations upon self. Even if you think you currently have it all, I challenge yourself to dig deeper and to reconsider ways you can still strive for more. Life is much more fulfilling when you are climbing towards achieving bigger goals as opposed to just staying in a state of stagnation.

Build the Right Social Circle – As much as I am for solitude and personal growth, that does not mean that you should ignore spending your time with others. It is important to invest in others who also invest in themselves and are like minded individuals with the same core values as yourself. It is also beneficial to surround yourself with people who are positive, successful, and who ultimately support you. There is no room for holding onto negative, miserable people and those who only bring you down which is why it is essential that you choose the right people to be a part of your social circle.

Life Is Too Short to Not LOVE Your Life – What to Do Today to Lead You On the Right Path

Although life is far from perfection and everyone is going to experience ups and downs throughout the course of their lifetimes, that does not mean that life needs to be spent more in the negative than the positive. Seriously, life is too short to not LOVE your life so rather than settling on mediocrity or living day by day aimlessly, strive to LOVE your life! There are certainly ways to improve your life today and everyday to ensure that you are creating a path of intrinsic happiness and a life you absolutely love living. (Why like your life when you can love it?) 😉 ❤

Know What You Love and Want – Many people don’t think about what they want in life which can often make life lack a sense of direction or have a meaningful purpose. I believe we are all born with unique gifts and passions so it is important to channel into our strengths while also taking the time to pursue the things we enjoy most. By determining what brings joy also helps in providing clarity as to what is desired.

Focus on the Positive – It is incredibly bothersome when you hear people complain about what they don’t have or how their life is miserable when they could actually be investing their energy into being grateful for what they currently do have, setting goals to make life improvements, and possessing a positive mindset. Being positive really goes a long way in life by attracting abundance and creating the things you want most.

Embrace the Good and the Bad – Again, life isn’t perfect and it’s going to throw some curve balls along the way but it is possible to dodge them in its entirety or be prepared in handling them in the best way possible. By that I mean, it is important to understand that sometimes you really need to go through bad times or deal with misfortunes for the greater good which can include learning a valuable lesson or building inner strength. It is easy to embrace all the good things but it’s equally beneficial to embrace the bad because ultimately you are going to rise above it.

Implement the Changes NecessaryHate your job? Change it! Not happy with your current relationship? Maybe it’s time to change that too! We should never be settling on anything simply for the sake of it. If there is something major (or even minor) bringing your life down in any way, build a game plan to CHANGE it! You have to recognize and be conscious of when it is time to change your life even if that means you need to start over or the change is out of your comfort zone because it is better than staying stagnant or unhappy.

Make It Happen – You are in the driver’s seat of your life and have the power to navigate it anywhere you want to go! So it’s up to you to navigate your life in the direction you want by taking action and actually executing everything that you want as opposed to just thinking or dreaming about it. Go out there and make it happen!