Author Archives: Make Up the Life You Love

About Make Up the Life You Love

Hi, my name is Meli and I am the creator of Make Up the Life You Love!

A Setback is Actually Life’s Way of Creating a Set Up

Have you ever encountered what appeared to be a setback in your life? You might not have gotten a job you wanted or an opportunity that you were striving for at the current moment. While many might experience feelings of frustration, negativity, sadness, or even anger–this is a time to stay positive and shift your mindset to the idea that a better opportunity will be knocking on your door at a later time and when the time is right for you. In order for this to happen though, the key is that you need to actually believe in this! You need to understand that the Universe is full of abundance and when one door closes (or in this case never opened), that there are plenty of open doors on the horizon (whoever said there can only be one 😉 –there is no need to limit yourself).

I know in the present moment, it can be hard to think and feel this way. You might feel a deep sense of emptiness which is normal and it is totally justified to feel that way but it is up to you to hold those feelings only temporarily. Meaning that they will eventually go away and that you cannot allow them to stay permanently because then you will continue to cloud your mind with more negativity and mental setbacks to prevent you from manifesting life’s many set ups that are in store for you. So let’s trust the Universe and stay positive in order to keep the doors open for more setups to come, shall we? 🙂 🙂 🙂

Election Day 2020 (One Week Away) – 5 Safety Tips for Voting During a Pandemic

Election Day in the United States is exactly a week away and happens to fall not only during a pandemic but during a time where cases are starting to spike again across the country. Does this mean you should forfeit your opportunity to vote this year in order to stay safe? No way, I don’t think so! What this does mean is that extra safety precautions will be needed for in-person voting or you can choose another voting alternative this year. As much as I enjoy the process of going to a local voting booth to cast my vote, I decided to fill out my ballot and hand deliver it at a drop off box within my community. If you are nervous your vote might not be counted for, there are websites (this varies based on your state) that actually track your vote. In the state of New Jersey where I am from, I created an account and was able to see the exact date my vote was cast. If you do a google search, you should readily be able to find a ballot tracker based on the state you are from.

Now if you are going to still vote in-person, there are a few safety tips to keep in mind to prevent the likelihood of coming in contact with the virus.

Wear Your Mask at All Times – I feel as though this should go without saying but I cannot emphasize the importance of wearing a mask whenever you are in public or places where there are groups of people which includes the voting booths.

Bring A Pen Instead of Using Theirs – There will definitely not be a shortage of pens at the polls and they probably have a way to sanitize them between use but I still would advise bringing your own pen instead to prevent the potential spread of germs.

Clean Your Hands Frequently with Your Own Hand Sanitizer – Although the polls will most likely have plenty of hand sanitizers, I would still recommend being prepared and have your own handy. Of course the less contact your hands are to your surroundings, the better yet it is wise to be prepared to sanitize your hands any time you touch something.

Try to Go During Off Peak Hours – If possible, try to go during times the polls will have less people. If you are in a city, this might be tough to do as it will be inevitable that you will be stuck waiting on line; however, if there are times you can go in which there will be less crowds (usually in the middle of the day while most people are working), then plan to go during these times.

Avoid Socializing and Stay Social Distanced – As much as it is nice to chat with someone while you are in line or talk to someone you ran into who you know, this is not a good time to get too close to someone or to carry on a conversation. It is obviously not personal and people should be understanding given the circumstances.

People Who Are Connected to the Universe Believe in These 3 Principles

I can tell a lot about someone based on how they talk about their lives and specifically how spiritually connected they are to the Universe. On the surface, there are some people who come off as extremely lucky. It is not that these people are more lucky than someone else, they are just more spiritually connected to the Universe. They believe in certain principles that bring them everything that they want. I guess you can say they create their own luck but I believe it goes beyond that. Their luck stems from the depth of their spirituality paired with a strong, positive mindset, not so much at random or by coincidence despite it appearing that way. It is never too late to become more spiritual so even if you don’t believe in these things at the present moment, you can start to adapt them at any time.

Trust the Process / Everything is in its Right Place – People who are deeply connected to the Universe are always under the understanding that everything is in its right place in their current place of time. In other words, what is meant to be will be. Even during unfortunate times, they recognize that they need to experience that in order to get to the greater good. They don’t hold regrets about anything they experience in their lives because it shapes their inner being and they know everything that happens has a purpose–both the good and the bad.

The Universe is Full of Abundance – The Universe has endless opportunities and provides abundance for everyone who believes in this principle. This is why people who are spiritually connected to the Universe are never bent regarding a lost job or a failed relationship along with anything they no longer have or have just yet. They know that opportunities will come and go but that there are many to go around. There is no reason to be jealous of someone else’s abundance because there are unlimited opportunities for everyone. Rather than feeling sorry for themselves for not having something that someone else has, they congratulate them and know that they will get everything that they want as well because the Universe is the gift that keeps on giving.

Be Grateful For Everything You Currently Have While Always Striving for More – People who are connected to the Universe are some of the most grateful individuals you will ever meet in this world. Even if they do not have much, they are still grateful for the little things they do have. They never focus on the things they lack but invest their energy on all the things they are grateful for having which attracts more abundance into their lives. Even those who have obtained a lot do not take it for granted and are thankful to the Universe for providing them everything that they want. They also deeply believe in this: Everything they want is on its way. 😉 It doesn’t have to be tomorrow, they know all good things are worth waiting for and it goes back to the first principle, they trust the process in which they are in the process of receiving their deepest desires.

When People Really Are Too Busy – Learn How to Accept it (or Move On)

Often times if someone is too busy, it is seen as quite a negative thing. People automatically interpret that the person is just not that interested or perhaps aloof and detached. While in many cases this can be the case, this is NOT always the case–some people really are too busy. Some people may have multiple things in their lives to balance whether it is their career, education, and/or family life. Some people truly do not have as much free time. Does this mean that they do not want to hang out with you? My answer is: Not necessarily. (So there is no need to take it personally!)

As a professional makeup artist, I work in a services profession which requires that I work most weekends and this can vary from weekend to weekend just depending on how many bookings I have. While most people are off on the weekends to hang out, this is not often the case for me unless I am working during a slow season such as the winter. This also means that making concrete weekend plans weeks in advance can be dicey and sometimes the little free time that is left for myself on a weekend I just prefer to be left alone to sleep, relax, or work out.

I recognize that people with extremely busy schedules can be frustrating to hang out with but there are a few ways to navigate this.

Respect the Other Person’s Space and Time – If their time is limited, do not ask for too much of their time because they may just not have the time to give. If you are understanding of their time and space, they will not feel pressured and will be more inclined to want to spend time with you once they have some free time in their schedules.

Be Patient if They Take Longer to Respond – Although we live in a world where sending a text message is quick and easy, not everyone is physically on their phones at all times to reply. The worst thing you can do is double text or constantly send them messages to get their attention. If they are genuinely busy then there is no need to remind them of your presence as they will get back to you at their earliest convenience.

Find Hobbies and Personal Interests to Occupy Your Time – If you know of set times that this person is usually unavailable, find hobbies and things to do during that time rather than always waiting around for them. It is good to have your own separate life with your own personal interests that does not involve the other person.

Work Around Their Schedule – It is important to be as accommodating and flexible as possible when trying to make plans with this person. If they have to cancel last minute due to a work function or something that is of importance, then do not give them a hard time about it and just let them be the ones to reschedule it with you. They will make the time for you if you allow them to.

Know the Difference Between Whether the Person Actually is Too Busy or Just Not That Into You – As I mentioned, there will be instances where you come across someone who is not direct enough to say they are uninterested but will rather just appear to be too busy all the time. Unfortunately, this means they are trying to spell out that they are too busy to spend their time with you. In this scenario, you are better off leaving this person alone altogether. If they are interested in reconnecting, then they will find a way to do so.

[Final Note: Also keep in mind that if you find that the person never has enough time to spend with you as you would like, it might be a good idea to find someone who has the same expectations as you of how much quality time is spent with one another. Each person can grow very resentful towards each other if they feel as though one person is not getting enough time while the other feels they are giving more than they actually have to give. In order to strike the right balance, it is important to have these open conversations. If you find that this will always cause a conflict without much of a solution, then find someone who has the same expectations as you in terms of how much time is spent together and apart.]

If Someone is Very Selective, Let Them Select You

There are certain people that are incredibly picky when they go about dating. No one ever seems to be good enough and they often are single or just never settle down. People might assume they have commitment problems, are emotionally unavailable, or they are not marriage material; however, there is also the possibility that the person just does not come in contact with people they want to be with all too often meaning they are super picky or they might not even fully know what they are looking for (which is a separate problem in and of itself).

I always advise if the person has stated they are picky or it is very apparent based on their words and their actions, I recommend you do not invest too much of your time. Even if you are incredibly accommodating and do what you can to please this person, it might still never be enough or they will find something very small as a reason they do not want to date you or as a reason to move on to the next person. Who really wants to deal with that? That is the reason I do not recommend getting attached to someone like this because chances are you will always be the one left wanting more or with a broken heart.

People who are super selective typically do end up staying single most of their lives. It is not your job to try to change this about them or make them fall in love with you. Why do you want to be in a position that you always have to live up to their expectations and please them constantly just for them to figure out if you are worthy enough for them? Relationships should be reciprocal. Both people mutually want to be together and want to do things to make each other happy. This person chooses you and accepts you for who you are. They are not dating you until the next best person steps into their lives or constantly looking for someone who is better in their eyes (if this even exists) because you are enough.

If you really like this person and do not want to give up on them, you can keep sticking around but when things fail to progress as planned, do not tell me I did not warn you. The best thing you can do is back off and let them select YOU. Turn the tables on them by making them work hard to be with YOU versus you always catering to them. If they do not reach out or put the effort needed to keep you in the forefront of their lives, then you know you are better off without this person. I know that might be a hard reality to accept but trust me on this one and keep it moving. It is better to know that now than to find this out days, weeks, or years later. Everyone’s time is precious and this includes yours in which it is important to stop investing it in the wrong people.

5 Ways to Become a Morning Person If You Aren’t Already

Not everyone is a morning person and some people naturally work better in the evenings. For me personally, I like to start my day very early because it makes the days feel longer in which I can be much more productive. Over the summer months, I fell out of a routine of waking up early as I did not have as much structure but now I am back on track to being a morning person again. I will share a few habits that will help if you want to transition into becoming a morning person.

Start Setting the Alarm Earlier in Increments – If your goal is to start waking up at 6am everyday but you currently wake up at 9:30am, this can be a tough adjustment to do in a matter of days. Start off by setting the alarm at 8:30am for the next few days, then 7:30am, and work your way all the way down to your desired wake up time.

A Little Coffee Goes a Long Way – I was never a big coffee drinker until the start of 2020. I got into the habit of having a small amount of coffee in the mornings as a pre workout as I usually start my day at the gym before anything else. The energy boost is helpful in making my workouts more effective along with actually jump starting my morning. On certain days, I sometimes I have a little bit of coffee in the mid afternoon if I feel as though I could benefit from it.

Take a Nap if Needed – Not everyone is in a position with their work schedule to leisurely take a nap in the afternoon but if you can fit in a short nap at any point during the day, I do recommend it. I would say nothing over an hour or you might not be able to go to bed at an earlier time later that evening.

Start Getting Ready for Bed Much Earlier Than Bedtime – It is easy to get distracted at night so you may not physically get into bed as early as planned if you do not start getting ready soon enough. That is why I recommend getting ready for bed much sooner than your actual bedtime. This can include getting changed into sleepwear, brushing your teeth, washing your face, and doing whatever else your evening routine includes at a much earlier time.

Determine an Exact Bedtime and Actually Get Into Bed at That Time – If you have determined that you are going to go to bed at 10pm, make sure you actually get into bed at that time under no other circumstances. If it takes you some time to fall asleep at night, it might be a good idea to get into bed about 10-15 minutes sooner to ensure you fall asleep by your predetermined bedtime.

Most habits take some time to pick up so do not be discouraged if it takes you time to get into a good morning routine. It can take days or it can take weeks but if you work on staying consistent, you will find you can work towards becoming a morning person.

The Mind of an Artist – 3 Affirmations That Will Uplift Your Life

Many people often times underestimate the power of affirmations but I truly believe that they are effective in maintaining a positive state of mind while also keeping you happy on a deep spiritual level. As an artist, it comes natural for me to think of these affirmations but they can still apply to you no matter what you do for a living or pursue in life.

I create everything I desire. – For me personally, I rely on creating whether I am doing makeup professionally or even as I am writing this post. Aside from that, the bigger things in life, I know I have the capacity to also create those things because I truly believe everything I want in life will manifest through the state of creation.

I am my own work of art. – This can be interpreted in many ways. It means that on the inside, I am my own unique person with many gifts to offer to the world. From the outside, I look at my actual image and appearance as a work of art with the mindset that I am an object of desire.

My life is a masterpiece. – In order to live my life this way, it again all goes back to creation along with visualization. I visualize specific things that I want and take the action steps needed to create it. Everyone’s vision for one’s life is going to vary but taking the time visualize it is the first step followed by focusing on this vision and ‘painting it’ which will often require time and patience. No masterpiece is painted overnight and your life is created from each day and moment in time.

As a reminder, you do not have to be an artist to start applying these affirmations towards your life–remember that anyone can do it, it just starts with your mind first. 😉

Traveling and Dating – Who Should Pay for What?

I actually have had this question asked a few times in regards to wanting solid advice on what is the right thing to do in terms of how couples should handle expenses while on vacation when they are ‘just dating’ (not married and perhaps have only have been dating for a short time). To be honest, there really is no set answer to this one because there are so many factors involved and each dating situation is different. For example, are we talking about a weekend getaway or full week vacation overseas?

I think that if one person (usually the man but hey, it’s 2020–anything is possible nowadays) is paying for all or a contribution towards your travel expenses such as the flight and accommodations then it can be expected that once you arrive at the destination, you can pick up a good amount or at least some of the food and entertainment tabs. Personally, it just feels good to reciprocate if someone is that generous to pay most of or all my travel fees up front.

If both people are paying separately and in this case for me as the woman, the man I am dating is not paying anything towards my personal travel expenses, then I do not really expect to pay for meals or much during that time away. In a normal situation when I’m NOT traveling, I do expect a man to pay for most meals (unless it is a special occasion or I am asked to pay the tip). Why? I firmly believe in gender roles and that they should still exist. Whereas I know not everyone might feel the same because the counter argument could be that most women are in the work force today. If a woman has a stable career/job and can pay for meals as well, why is she not paying those bills? I totally understand this way of thinking, it makes sense to me as well but it does not change the principle or belief that I have which is that a man should want to pay for the dates. It actually for me has nothing to do with money being spent but to do with showing a woman that he wants to take care of her along with being chivalrous and conveying his financial strength. Especially in the early stages of the dating game, if a guy is asking the woman to go 50/50 or to pay for dates, then my immediate thought is, “Next.” I do not mean that in an entitled, conceited, or stuck up kind of way. I might still stay to get to know the guy better but I am not going to invest too much of my time because I have been in the dating game long enough to know that this is the golden standard (if you ask most men, they actually do want to pay) and there are an abundance of men who would never ask a woman to take her wallet out. So why would I make an exception now or settle for someone who is a 50/50 kind of guy? I actually do not encounter those kind of men in my life because I set my standard from the start what my expectations are (which mind you, I don’t think is even much to ask) and if this were to be a problem, my response would be, “Then don’t date me.” In other words, I am not going to lower my dating standards as I could keep it moving at that point. However, with travel, I recognize things can add up fast depending on where you go and how long you are away in which I think offering to pay for things from time to time is classy and often appreciated.

Note for Men: I think it is extremely important to consider, if you do NOT plan to pay for much during the trip or expect a more equal contribution financially with how money will be spent throughout the duration of the vacation, then you absolutely need to have this conversation and set those standards. Just as it is important for women to set standards, men should be doing this as well. I have had many male friends complain to me how they do not like having to pay for things all the time when they are dating–especially if there is not a relationship status or if they are unsure how much they like the other person. I ask if they have expressed that to the person they are dating and often times the answer is, “No.” Most women would not know this is bothersome unless it is brought to their attention. Chances are, they would be more than willing to contribute or to pay for things too. Like anything in life, you just have to ask.

How to Spot a Type A Personality – 10 Characteristics to Look For

Although I think it is a little too generalized to categorize people between two groups, it is said that there are two different personality types: Type A and Type B. There is definitely a radical difference between the two with Type A being more competitive and goal oriented whereas a Type B is ultra relaxed and laid back. That is a general sense of their differences but there are definitely more specific things to look for. Type A personality types tend to possess very distinct traits that are easy to detect which include the following:

  • They are fast moving people and always on the go. They tend to also walk fast and like to maximize their time as much as possible. They have little patience for long lines, delays, and wasted time.
  • They are constantly in planning mode. They plan their every move whether it is as simple as their current day or within their future. In order to stay organized, they heavily rely on alarms, to do lists, and a personal planner to stay on track.
  • They strive to find a meaning and purpose behind everything they do. If there is no value behind their actions then they do not really see the point.
  • They are extremely career oriented and invest most of their time towards building their careers. This can sometimes mean they put their personal lives on the back burner in order to stay focused on their education and/or career path (aka their life purpose).
  • They have very little tolerance for people who are unmotivated. They do not understand this whatsoever because this is far from their personality type. Type A personality types are extremely self motivated and disciplined by nature.
  • They often times find it difficult to relax and prefer to be productive instead. The concept of relaxing could actually be more stressful for them because they feel more at ease when they are getting something accomplished.
  • They are doers and like to make things happen as opposed to being inactive . They are constantly building and expanding things in their lives which very often is linked to their career but can overlap in other areas in their lives.
  • They are super focused when it comes to setting goals and finding ways to achieve them. They recognize this often times means putting in the hard work but this is their sense of normalcy so it comes very natural for them to be hard working people.
  • They tend to be perfectionists. This is not to say that Type B personality types cannot be perfectionists as well but that Type A personalities are more prone to it because they are hyper focused on being the most efficient while also being overly critical of themselves. They feel there is always room for improvement and will strive for it rather than settling on staying stagnant.
  • They hold very high expectations in just about all areas of their lives (including themselves). This can include their job, significant other, home, etc. The bar is always set high for them.

How to Prevent Your Adult Children from Living at Home Forever

Little did I realize when I was old enough to make the statement, “Kids today…” what I was actually referring to was adult kids today. In today’s generation, young adults live at home for a much extended period than ever before. Don’t get me wrong, there are some advantages to staying at home that include saving money, seeing your family on a daily basis, and security. When one comes from a financially secure family, there is no need to worry about if there is going to be food on the table or if the mortgage/rent along with other living expenses are going to be paid on time. All sounds well and good but allowing adult children to stay home without much of a deadline or expiration date aka expectation for them to leave, this is actually hindering them from becoming an independent adult and allowing them to create their own security for themselves. As parents, one of the greatest gifts that can be provided for their children is to teach them how to stand on their own two feet as opposed to giving everything or doing everything for them which puts them in the adult children category. So how exactly can you encourage young adults to want to grow up and move out already?

Plant the Seed When They Are Young – It is extremely important to start with a strong foundation from the very start of their childhood. In order to do this, you need to set high expectations for your children, especially as they become young adults. If they understand what their expectations are along with ways in which they can meet their expectations, chances are they will automatically rise to the occasion without much of a push needed.

Teach Them Life Skills – This is absolutely crucial in their own personal self development that will carry them throughout life. If you take the time to teach basic life skills like how to manage money effectively, do basic things autonomously, and to be independent, then once they are old enough to live on their own, they will have all the tools in the tool belt (in this case, life skills) to make it happen and quite successfully too might I add.

Stop Doing Everything for Them – Parents tend to want to do everything for their children. If you continue to do things such as their laundry, cooking all their meals, and much more, then why would there ever be an incentive to leave this scenario? By continuing to do everything, this also could potentially promote laziness, which is never an attractive quality.

Give Extra Responsibilities – If they are not motivated to move out on their own, then there should be extra responsibilities around the house or to benefit the family more. This can be a combination of having them contribute financially in some way along with added chores such as having them do the grocery shopping, clean the bathrooms, cook meals for the family, etc. At least this way, they are contributing in some way, learning how to become more responsible, and hopefully by assigning too much to them, this will serve as a huge incentive for them to start the process of looking for places to live.

Guide Them Every Step of the Way – Over time, it can be a very touchy subject to bring up the idea of moving out and often become the elephant in the room. Rather than shaming them or placing an ultimatum, it is wise to guide them in the direction of moving out. This can be done by assisting them in looking for listings for a place to rent/buy, find ways to help them save money, offer to help in any way once they begin the moving process, and much more. It can be a scary transition for certain people to move out for the first time so any way you can ease them will be much appreciated.

Although it might be too late to take back their childhood in terms of how you raised your kids, that does not mean it is ever too late to make some changes for their future. It might be much more difficult but it can definitely be done if you take the time to focus on promoting them to grow up and be independent adults. It might take many baby steps to get to the end goal of having an adult child move out but ultimately it will lead to the greater good along with elevating their self confidence and self worth.