Last week at the IHeartRadio Music Awards, Jennifer Lopez was awarded the 2022 Icon Award at the age of 52 years old. As she graciously accepted the award, she stated, “Let me tell you something else, I’m just getting started.” While many won’t have a career as remarkable as J.Lo, that is not the point. It is her mindset that is the takeaway and something that anyone can adapt besides her. She essentially is saying that this is only the beginning of many more achievements and things are going to keep getting better–(aka an abundance mindset). It is clear that she does not view age as a setback and embraces it knowing that she has even more to accomplish. This is not only a positive outlook to have but also an empowering way to look at life.
Many seem to associate aging or getting older as a bad thing and that age dictates our lives in a very negative way. Why does it have to be that way though? Even if that is what someone else might think or what society might portray, who says that you have to think that way? People too often use aging as an excuse as to why they let themselves go or that their social lives are not as exciting as in their youth or that things essentially go downhill over time. Again, it does not have to be this way unless you choose for it to be this way. If anything, I think that people need to possess the opposite mindset. With age, there are many spiritual gifts added to enhance your life including more life experiences, success, wealth, happiness, security, and much more. Age might bring upon more responsibilities such as raising a family or added job roles within a career; however, this can be expected and it is always better to be progressing in life than staying stagnate where there is little to no change.
Each year of life is a blessing and should be seen as an opportunity to expand life and make it an amazing one. People should not be stating that they are “too old” to do anything or whenever a birthday passes by. It is also important to keep in mind that age is just a number and certain life experiences and milestones that you are striving for might come sooner than expected or perhaps arrive later in life which is okay because everybody’s life path is different. Don’t ever let age be seen as a setback or used as an excuse as to why your life is not a spectacular one. Getting older should never serve as a roadblock against success, love, or happiness. As far as I am concerned, life should only get better with age and it is apparent that J.Lo feels the same way! 😉
I have written many blogs on the subject of being single and happy along with how it can very well be a good thing; however, I have not really taken the time to write about ways to be remain happy when you are in a relationship. So I will take a moment to reflect and delve into that subject matter because it is just as important to find happiness while you are in a relationship (whether it be a casual relationship or a permanent one) as it is to be happy when you are single.
Find the Right Partner – This is the most essential component of finding happiness in any relationship is to actually find a partner whom you are compatible with and that you overall get along with. The more similar you are with your partner and the more you both see eye-to-eye on most important areas in life, the less likely that there are going to be arguments or any built up tension between each other.
Establish Respect and Healthy Boundaries – It is extremely important with any relationship, that there is mutual respect for one another along with healthy boundaries to be in place which should be established at the very early stages of any relationship to ensure that both people are on the same page. This is not only the foundation of a happy relationship but also a very healthy one.
Work Together – It is very easy in a relationship to attack your partner or to take a single minded approach whenever a problem arrives. Nothing really gets accomplished when two people work against each other which is why you need to make it a point to understand each other’s point of view and to always work together. Keep in mind that it is expected that compromises and sacrifices are going to be needed for promoting togetherness and the greater good of the relationship. Two people will feel better knowing that the end goal is to work towards coming together as one as opposed to fighting with each other which causes separation, resentment, and typically no real solution.
Focus on the Positive Without Expecting Perfection – Realistically, there is no such thing as a “perfect” partner in which you will love every single quality about the person; however, I do very much believe that you can find what you define as your perfect match where your partner possesses many desirable qualities that you are attracted to. That is why you always should fixate on the positive qualities of the person you choose to be with. If you focus on their best qualities, then there is a higher chance that you will naturally feel happier being with this person. If you find that their bad qualities outweigh the good, then this might be a good time to break off the relationship and consider finding a new partner altogether.
Love Yourself Above Anything Else – This might come across as an oxymoron and you might be thinking, “So you’re telling me to love myself above anything else in order to be happy in a relationship? How do I do both at the same time?” What I really am pointing out is the importance of SELF LOVE. If this is something that you recognize that you need to work on, it is wise to work on increasing self love before getting into a serious relationship. Remember that when you love yourself, you will always find happiness from within regardless of your relationship status. Self love can also serve as a spiritual tool that can help you make your very best dating decisions in your life and guide you towards finding your true match. Think about it, when you love yourself above anything else, it is much easier to weed out the toxic people who only bring your life down and as a result, only pursue a relationship that is going to bring you unlimited happiness throughout your lifetime.
Not everyone has high health standards and the way in which one chooses to live life can be radically different from individual to individual. It is quite common to see two people in a relationship that might have the intention to stay healthy and fit but over time, one or both might start to let themselves go due to lack of motivation, a busy work schedule, stress, or simply just out of the comfort of being in a steady relationship. Whatever the reason may be, you have to remember that it is really up to the other individual to want to stay healthy more so than what their partner says. So keep in mind, even if you want a loved one to change, if the other person is content with their current health habits or lack there of, there never will be a change. So knowing this, is it worth asking your partner to live a healthier lifestyle or to do something about their weight?
I think the subject of weight in general is an extremely touchy subject. People tend to be concerned with either being too overweight or being too underweight. While most are probably more concerned if their partner gains excessive weight, there is also the opposite spectrum where someone is losing too much weight such as an eating disorder which is just as detrimental as being overweight. The best thing to do is to positively encourage your partner to make better health choices. If you approach your partner in a loving and supportive way, then there is a much higher chance that the person will at least be receptive to making a change. If you were to attack your partner and tell them that they have a weight problem, this is not going to be very successful because putting anyone down in a negative tone is not really going to accomplish anything and could also potentially cause a rift on your overall relationship. In addition, it is going to make the person feel worse about themselves and this might have the opposite effect where they feel hopeless and the problem gets even worse.
Besides providing support to your partner, another good way to gently encourage your partner to make healthier choices is to lead by example. If you can demonstrate that you are conscientious about your diet and exercise habits, then this gives the other person the opportunity to follow your lead. If you can also make being healthy and fit a priority to focus on together, then this also makes it easier for the other person to adapt. This can mean food shopping together and cooking nutritious meals together. Another idea is to schedule working out on the same days so that you can create quality time together while being fit at the same time.
At the end of the day, people are going to make their own personal choices in life and this applies to diet and exercise as well. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water but it is up to the horse to want to drink it. If you are going to go out of your way to try to get your partner to adjust their health habits or to make any positive change, remember that a loving and supportive approach is the way to go.