Category Archives: Change

How to Get Your Mind Off of Someone

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It is very easy to get your mind hung up on an ex or someone who you like very much. The good news is that there are definitely ways to overcome this and to get your mind fixated on other things. I recognize that it is very easy on the surface to apply these techniques but to still feel like they are not working effectively. However, over time you will see that they will begin to work. It really is all a matter of shifting your mindset and training your brain. You can’t expect instant gratification where you can forget about someone simply after reading this blog or after a short amount of time. The truth of the matter is, it could actually take a lot of time to get over someone–and that’s okay. All that matters is that you get the recovery process started…

Keep Your Life Busy – The more free time you have, you’ll find that you’ll spend that time thinking about someone because you have nothing else better to do. While having free time is often seen as a good thing, it can actually serve as a very negative thing if you are not living your life to the fullest or to your greatest potential. It can be extremely detrimental to your self development, create laziness, hinder motivation, and prevent yourself from stepping out of your comfort zone. Instead of sitting around at home, occupy your time with more work, think about a new career path, pursue some hobbies, go back to school, or consider booking a vacation to get out of your house. Everyone can use a change of scenery every so often. Regardless of how you choose to allocate your time (as that is up to you)–remember it is better to have a fully booked schedule than to have too much open space on your hands.

Learn How to Make Yourself Happy – So many people rely their happiness on the happiness they receive from other people. Unfortunately, this is far from a happy mentality. A happy mentality stems from having the capacity of knowing how to make yourself happy–with or without someone. If you know how to master this life skill, chances are you will never find yourself in a position where you are seeking validation from others or finding yourself over focused on someone where you cannot get over them. The reason being is that when you learn how to create your own inner happiness, you know how to be happy without someone else and you are at inner peace with yourself during moments of solitude.

Out of Sight, Out of Mind Means No Contact – This might seem pretty obvious but it is worth stating that one of the best ways to truly get over someone is to eliminate all forms of contact with this person. If you are already at this stage, then kudos to you. If you are still in communication, then this is a good time to cut off all forms of communication or at the very least, find ways to limit them. Yes, this also means removing or blocking this person from your social media or maybe deactivating your own social media. This way, there is zero temptation to click on their stories to see what they are up to or to look at their photographs. If this person chooses to contact you–remember that you are not obligated to respond and can still continue to practice no contact. This also gives you the opportunity to fully detach yourself from this person which is the end goal.

Make the Time to See Your Friends and Family – If you are more introverted by nature, this might be a hard thing to do but it is definitely beneficial to make quality time for your closest friends and family. If they live far away, then consider making the time to talk to them on the phone or through a chat. It is important to surround yourself with the people who you care about most and surrounding yourself with good energy. This will distract your mind from thinking about someone else. They can also serve as emotional support if you are going through a difficult breakup or just need someone to talk to who will listen to you.

Set New Goals and Continue to Better Yourself – Regardless of your current life situation, this should ALWAYS be a top priority in your life. You need to constantly be thinking of new ways to improve yourself and to set goals that you are actually excited about achieving. If you live your life without putting mindful intentions into the Universe, you will be left feeling very empty inside and have nothing to look forward to in life. This negative scarcity energy will sadly continue to bring your life down by allowing you to think about someone who chances are–is not thinking about you in return. It’s a sad reality but it’s the truth. Why invest your energy into someone who does not value you? You are way better off utilizing this energy by investing it into your goals and your self development.

2024 Has Been a Wild Year So Far – An Earthquake, Solar Eclipse, and What’s Next?

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As we finish up the first quarter of 2024 already, I have to say that this has been a relatively wild year. Putting aside recent events which I will delve into a little later in this post–I think that this year has brought upon a unique set of challenges for many people who I know personally–(yes, myself included). I feel that 2024 has definitely been the year of uncertainty and a time of deep life reflection with many life lessons to be learned. The last time life felt this way was back around this time four years ago back in 2020 when everyone was locked down due to Covid-19. While we have thankfully come a long way since, there is this creepy parallel between 2020 and 2024 in my eyes. While it is still very early in the year to make personal progress in self development and for things to take a positive turn–it feels that this might not happen for awhile and that we will all just need to remain both resilient and positive until we move back to better times. (Don’t worry, try not to lose any trust in the Universe–we will be back to good times again at some point)! Now moving on to earthquakes…


While I recognize that earthquakes are quite normal in certain parts of the world, experiencing an earthquake in New Jersey is not common whatsoever. I was off of work that day and was driving so I did not feel it at all at the time that it occurred. However, the epicenter happened to happen in my area so all of my family and friends had felt it. It extended many miles so even my family members in Long Island and Connecticut had felt it too. Many hours later, around 6pm there was an aftershock by me. I was actually home this time and I saw items on the top of my dresser shaking. I couldn’t believe it! I have been reading that there will probably be a series of aftershocks as a result of the earthquake in the weeks to come. We shall see…so what about that solar eclipse that everyone was talking about?


There was also a total solar eclipse in certain parts of North America this past Monday on April 8th–just a few days after the earthquake shook everyone up on Friday, April 5th. It had been hyped for many weeks leading up to the day of so although I am far from a science person; I did go outside with solar eclipse glasses and tried to see if I could see the solar eclipse with my very eyes. Being that it was very cloudy at the time of the solar eclipse, I did not see anything. Many other people I spoke to had difficulty seeing it too unfortunately. It was a slight let down but at the same time, I was pretty indifferent in regards to the solar eclipse to begin with. I just carried on with the remainder of my day after it passed like any other day.

With so much happening within such a short amount of time these past few days, you have to wonder…so what’s next? At least, that’s what I’m thinking about right now as I write this blog. As always in life…to be continued 😉

Stop Blaming Yourself For Your Failures – Do These Things Instead

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Experiencing failure is an inevitable experience in life and although it is associated with frustration, sadness, and other negative feelings–there are ways to fail and still persevere. It is very natural to want to blame yourself for your failures but that can leave you feeling very upset and prevent you from recovering. First and foremost, you need to walk away from any failure with a positive attitude. You need to detach yourself from any negativity and find ways to move forward with your life. This can be a very good time for self reflection where you do not dwell so much on the failure itself but you find ways to look past it. During this time, you should also think about ways of improving the outcome in the future and to motivate yourself to try again and/or find better solutions. While you might go through moments where you feel defeated, it is essential that you do not let negativity steer you towards giving up or feeling bad about yourself. When you fall, you need to get yourself right back up and keep it moving. The same goes with when you fail–you need to just get back on track with your life and make some positive strides in the right direction.

While many of us strive for perfection, you need to recognize that life is not meant to be perfect at all times. If you never came across failures in life, there would be no room for spiritual growth. It is often during the dark times and the times that you fail that you are actually setting yourself up towards success in your future. You might not see it at the present moment but it all ends up making sense later. That is why you need to trust the Universe, even when you come across some failures along the way. You need to take these failures as life lessons and LEARN from them. That is the positive takeaway from any failure is to look at it as an opportunity to gain wisdom and pick up some valuable spiritual lessons along the way.

If you are still having a tough time mentally with whatever failure that you are going through, take this time not only for yourself but do not be afraid to seek out help and to reach out to those who care about you. It can be extremely helpful to talk to other people who have gone through similar experiences or to just express your feelings to someone. Some people like to bottle everything inside but it can actually be more beneficial to express yourself to others. You would be amazed at the amount of emotional support you would receive simply by speaking up and talking to a professional or to someone you know. For me personally, I cannot thank the supportive people around me enough for listening and empathizing with me when I needed it most. That is why it is important to surround yourself with a positive support system and to embrace seeking their advice during those times where you could use the extra emotional support.

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How My Money Perspective Has Changed From My 20s to My 30s – What Would I Do Differently? (If Anything)

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As I reflect about my life and my relationship with money, I would definitely say that my approach to spending, saving, and investing has radically changed over the years. Am I just becoming older and wiser or does the current state of the economy have any impact on my views on money? It can be a combination of things but I do believe that with life experience comes more knowledge. I have always had a passion for building wealth and that is something that has not changed since my 20s but my perspective is definitely different now and there are many ways in which I view money differently than I did a decade ago.

Having Money In My Bank Account Means More Than Spending It – I have always been a rather good money saver but over the years, I have become an even more aggressive saver. Why? As I have aged, it is just more satisfying to have a bigger bank account than to spend money on material goods or going out. I am much more willing to sacrifice my desires and wants now than I was able to in my youth. It comes more natural for me to say no to unnecessary purchases and to just save my money instead. For me personally, it just feels good to have a lot of money stored away in a bank account than to spend it.

Spending Money on Clothes Doesn’t Excite Me Anymore – I have always had a love for fashion and wearing stylish and flattering clothing. That would also mean having the nicest shoes and handbags to go with my outfits. Fast forward to the present moment and I now do not care about clothing like I used to. Over the years, I have accumulated a wonderful wardrobe of classics and staple pieces that still fit and look great year after year. This is why there really is no need to go out and constantly buy new clothes unless it is an item that is worn out and in need of a replacement. I also want to point out a valuable life lesson: No one really cares what you wear more than yourself. So there really is no need to overspend on clothing or feel the need to impress anyone because no one really cares about the clothing you wear. That is not to say that you should totally neglect your self image but to consciously make an effort to be less vain because at the end of the day–no one cares what you wear!

I am Obsessed With My Retirement Savings – When you are in your 20s, you do not really think about retirement enough unless you are taught the importance of compound interest and investing as early as you can. Fortunately, my mother had me open an IRA account at the age of 18 years old. While I was making contributions to my IRA as much as I could at the time (which wasn’t too much), my biggest regret is not making a conscious effort to max out my IRA contribution every single year. When I turned 30 years old, I made the conscious effort to start doing that and have really seen the increase over the years which is very encouraging. This motivates me to keep investing into my retirement and watching it grow over time.

My Time Is More Valuable Than Money – Despite how much I prioritize working and making money, as I have gotten older–I have tried to have more of a balance between my work life and personal life. In other words, I cherish and value having quality time as opposed to working nonstop. Sometimes you have to take the time to say no to work and actually enjoy living your life. I would rather just work less and make more as opposed to feeling like I need to work constantly. In the past, I would push myself to work as much as I can, even if that meant less free time to do the things that I loved. Although I still would consider myself a hard worker, I have toned down the intensity and have made having free time more of a priority over work.

Booking a Vacation Is Worth Every Penny – I have been an avid traveler since my mid to late 20s when I started to make a high enough income to allocate money towards one of my biggest passions in life–international travel. To this day, I still believe that travel is money well spent and something that I would never regret spending because the memories that are created are so worth it. While not everyone might have a love for travel, it is important to find something that you love and allow yourself to spend the money on your desired category of choice with zero regrets. I spent the money on travel then and will continue to spend my hard earned money on travel throughout the course of my lifetime. It can be an expensive hobby but it is one that I will always justify as an essential expense.

5 Subtle Signs That Your Partner Might Be Trying to Break Up With You

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When you are dating, it is inevitable that the relationship might not last over time. Sometimes people are left blindsided and hurt but the truth of the matter is–the signs were always there and it is up to you to be able to detect them. There are those rare scenarios when a relationship ends abruptly with no true explanation; however, the majority of the time, the relationship was leading to a breakup before it actually happened. If one takes the time to examine the other person’s behaviors leading up to the relationship to end, then it becomes more clear that this was going to happen sooner than later. Here are some subtle signs to look for that could prepare you for an upcoming breakup.

Less Communication – If you notice a person is slowly becoming less responsive, taking a long time to reply to you, or just not contacting you all too often, this typically is a subtle sign that the other person is trying to let you go without actually confronting you that this is their intent. While it is a cowardly approach, unfortunately, many people tend to do this because they do not know how to directly end the relationship or confront that they do not want to continue being together anymore. In order to gain clarity, it is natural to ask what is wrong but sometimes it is best to end it yourself when you start to notice a lessening in communication because you deserve a partner who makes the effort to be with you. There is a reason why communication is priority in a relationship so when you start to see less of it, that might be the time for you to walk away yourself.

Canceling Plans Last Minute – If your partner makes plans and is cancelling them often by choice, this is a major red flag. Yes, there will be situations in which life gets in the way and a plan would have to be cancelled but if this happens quite often and there is not really much effort in rescheduling or making it up to you, then it is pretty obvious that the person is losing interest and not making you a priority. If you are someone’s option but not a priority, then you are simply wasting your time as much as they are wasting yours. It is up to you to be proactive and not accept this behavior by being the one to stop offering your time and to consider ending the relationship.

A Drastic Pattern Change of Their Behaviors – If you notice that your partner is breaking their usual patterns, this can be a sign that they are starting to detach from you. For example, if the person usually sends you a good morning text and stopped all together, that might be something to cause you to wonder if the person lost interest or are starting to take you for granted. It is important to follow your instincts and to pay attention to these changed behaviors. Typically there is a reason for the change and it could be a sign that the relationship is no longer progressing towards a future.

Asking for a Break – Typically, a “break” is a nice way of asking to breakup or to apply extra space in a relationship that isn’t meant to last forever. It might be difficult for someone to end a relationship in its entirety so asking for a break is a stepping stone to the actual breakup. It allows the other person to test if they prefer to stay broken up or sometimes the space gives this person a chance to realize they miss the person. Either way, while a break can sometimes bring two people back together, oftentimes it is safe to say that a break will soon be followed by a breakup. Remember, when you have two loving people committed to a relationship, this would not even be a thought and the solution would be to stay together and to do whatever it takes to make things work.

There is No Talk of Your Future Together – If someone is genuinely interested in you and wants to be with you, then it will come natural for there to be conversations of what your future will look like TOGETHER. When someone avoids this topic or never thinks about spending their life with you, then chances are they never will. Yes, it could take some people a longer amount of time to develop those feelings but you should also not be in a position that you need to be waiting around for the other person to talk about the future. If you see a future with this person but the other doesn’t, then the relationship will probably end in a matter of time.

3 Goal Setting Mistakes to Avoid If You Want to Achieve All Your Goals

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Generally speaking, if you are conscientious about making goal setting a priority as a stepping stone in achieving your goals, then you are on the right path. However, there are definitely some common mistakes that are made that could actually set you back although your intentions might be in the right place. Here are a few common mistakes that you should recognize and find ways to improve so that your goal setting skills can actually lead to the best results.

Your Goals Are Not Specific Enough – It is easy to make some general goals without any true substance. A classic one is, “I want to live a healthier lifestyle.” Again, that sounds great but that is just too general of a goal to even mean anything or be measurable. If you can map out exactly what “living a healthier lifestyle” entails, then you are moving in the right direction. It is important to take the time to really break down very concise ways to make this achievable. This could include a set of mini goals that can lead to your main goal.

Not Believing in Your Goals – Your mindset truly dictates every area of your life. If you have goals but do not take them seriously in which you do not believe that they are even achievable then what do you expect? You need to BELIEVE in order to ACHIEVE. The sky is truly the limit but you need to believe in your potential. If you do not, then you will stay stagnant and not move any closer to fulfilling your goals. 

Failing to Take Any Action - Many people think about things that they want but it is pie in the sky if you expect the goals to manifest themselves without any effort. The Universe does not work like that. You need to stay focused on your goals by taking the action steps that are needed to get closer to them. Most things in life do require work and do not come handed to you which is why you need to take action daily and you will be able to achieve anything that you want.  

Never Neglect Yourself in Order to Receive Validation or Love From Another

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One of the biggest mistakes that I see when people are easing into a new relationship or desperately trying to form a new one with someone whom they admire is that the person starts to sacrifice self or do things to please the other person in order to earn their validation. This is a big dating mistake for a handful of reasons. For one, if you are not being your authentic self, then it is essentially false advertising if you are pretending to be someone who you are not. Maybe in the beginning, it is easy to do this but over time, your true character would come out and the person might feel blindsided or that they did not really know the real you. It is natural for there to be differences and sometimes this contrast is actually what heightens attraction. In other words, there is no real need to mask who you are to begin with and it is okay to not be exactly the same as the other person. It is good to have your own set of interests and not to feel that you have to like everything that the other person likes just to be liked by them.

If you meet someone who you want to impress and you make personal sacrifices to please this person, you might over time start to feel resentful or that you are not receiving as much in return if the other person is not reciprocating your efforts. That is why in the very beginning that it is important to take things slow and to resist your impulse to want to do whatever it takes to get the person you’re interested in to feel the same way because you do not want the relationship to become a one sided relationship. It is very easy for this to happen and for the other person to take advantage or just stick around for selfish reasons.

At the end of the day, you are simply not going to please every person who you like meaning that the feelings might not be mutual–so will you have to learn to accept that. Instead of overextending yourself and becoming a doormat to someone who most likely will never ever change their opinion of you, it is far wiser to just move on and find someone who will enjoy your company and like your authentic self. This should be the ultimate goal for your long term relationships. It is important to surround yourself around people who support, adore, and cherish you for you. It should not be conditional where they like you because you try to transform yourself to become someone who they want you to be and it is far from who you are at the core. Remember that when you embrace your true self, the right people will come your way and you will develop more healthier relationships that are reciprocal and fulfilling.  

Does “Money Buy Happiness?” – If Not, Then What Does?

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Many people hear the expression that “money buys you happiness.” While there is some truth to that in the sense that having the ability to spend it freely and providing financial security are very positive things that many of us strive for in our lifetimes–it does not necessarily guarantee you happiness. There are people who have a lot of money but might not know how to manage it successfully which eventually leaves them in more financial trouble or could bring upon more added stress into their lives. There are also people who have unlimited financial resources who live unfulfilling lives and simply aren’t happy. So what are some other keys to happiness that do not revolve around money? 

Pursuing a Meaningful Career That Adds Value to the World – It is really important to dig deep and determine what you want to do with your life and finding a career path that is spiritually rewarding and brings intrinsic happiness. When I say a “career,” that also can include volunteer work, being a parent, etc. It does not have to tie into a job that brings in an income but really just finding your authentic purpose in your life.

Building Healthy Relationships – People often underestimate the importance of human interaction and developing healthy relationships but it is very beneficial to have good people in your life. Even if you are someone that is introverted and prefer to spend most of your time alone, that does not mean that you should not have zero relationships in your life. It is wise to have a social circle of people who are there to support you and spend your quality time with.  

Loving Self to the Fullest – You might already hear this all the time (especially in this blog 😉 ) but you need to love yourself! If you are not in a place where you feel that you love yourself, then you need to determine ways to get to that place. This could mean finding a better job, getting out of a bad relationship that is preventing you from thriving, or pursuing new hobbies that bring you joy. It is a necessity to find and learn ways to love yourself to ensure you are bringing happiness into your life. 

Turning Your Resolutions Into Realities – Goal Setting Strategies for 2024

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Did you really think that I would let January go by without talking about setting goals in the new year? (I didn’t think so! 😉 ) While we should be setting goals on a daily basis, the beginning of the new year is a good opportunity to acknowledge your achievements from the previous year while reassessing what goals and/or changes you would like to make in the new year. The truth of the matter is, without making conscientious and concrete goals or thinking about your true desires, you are most likely not going to get too far and end up staying stagnant throughout life. Personally, I believe life is all about progression and taking action in order to obtain everything that you want to manifest. There are absolutely ways to turn your resolutions into realities and it is up to you to make it happen!  So let’s get started…

Write a Detailed List of Everything You Want to Achieve - It is essential to really think about what you want in your life and determine the direction your life is heading. Does that mean expanding your business or running your first marathon? The sky is the limit when it comes to your goals so make sure you visualize what you want and to then take the time to write everything down with as much detail as possible. I suggest writing down your goals on an index card or in a journal so you can hold yourself accountable and look back on them for reference. You can also track your progress and check off once you completed a goal.

Examine Your Habits and Change Them in Alignment with Your Goals – This is a crucial step but one that is often overlooked. Your habits shape your action and will dictate whether or not your goals are attainable. If you currently have habits that are hindering you from reaching your end goal, then you really need to focus on shifting your habits and changing them so they will ensure that you can achieve all your goals.

Apply Deadlines and Break your Goals Down Into Smaller Goals – It is a good idea to fine tune your goals and figure out the time frame in which you would like to fulfill them along with looking at whether or not you can break down your main goal into mini goals. The mini goals can then be looked at as stepping stones to your main goal. Oftentimes you need to break your goals down into more achievable goals in order to move closer towards the big goal. Some of the most worthwhile and valuable things in life could take a very long time to manifest which is why it is good to celebrate those little achievements along the way.

How to Deal with Negative People in Your Life

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Despite how positive you might be, it is inevitable that you are going to deal with negative people in your daily life. Sometimes they are your direct family or friends which can make it more challenging but there are definitely ways to maneuver these relationships in a way that will keep your sanity without having any negative effects on you personally. 

Change the Subject – Unfortunately, there are some people who just thrive on negativity and drama. If you find this to be the case, the best thing you can do is take control of the situation by just changing the subject in its entirety or divert the conversation into a different subject that you would much rather talk about. Chances are the person won’t even notice what you are doing this and will go along with whatever you choose to talk about instead.

Limit Your Time with this Person - Sometimes the best thing you can do is create some space and spend less quality time with this person. If your energy is surrounded by too much negativity, it will also bring your energy and life down. It is for this reason that you are better off to limiting your time together even if that means being alone. It is during the moments of solitude that you can focus on your goals and your very own self development. 

Change Your Social Circle – It is essential to find people with the same mindset as yourself and this includes choosing positive people who will enhance your life. With so many people in this Universe, it is possible to find others who possess positivity as opposed to surrounding yourself with negative people. As your life progresses, that can also mean that the people in your life can change and there is nothing wrong with that as people come and go in life and are not always meant to be in your life forever. 

Try to Counsel Them – If a person you know is going through a lot of tough times, sometimes the best thing you can do is listen and give your advice. While that might not always be the easiest choice, it is wise to be the bigger person and actually serve as a positive role model–especially if it is for a close friend or family member who really needs you right now. You never know how much this person will value your input and support while providing a positive impact on their life.