Author Archives: Make Up the Life You Love

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About Make Up the Life You Love

Hi, my name is Meli and I am the creator of Make Up the Life You Love!

Why Younger Generations Are Often Labeled Lazy And Ways to Prevent This

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While today’s youth face many challenges such as a higher cost of living, significantly higher costs for college education, and just an overall harder time getting ahead in life–it is somewhat understandable why it can take longer for young adults to get established and become financially independent. However, despite all of these setbacks, there are definitely ways to overcome this and to set up the younger generations for success. People complain that the younger generations are lazy and don’t want to work hard for anything. They favor instant gratification and doing what is least required of them in order to get by. While I don’t want to generalize everyone to be in this category, I do have to agree that this is the common trend with the youth nowadays. While many do not want to hear this, this issue stems mostly from PARENTING. If you parent your children in a way to allow them to achieve their goals and build them to be independent adults as opposed to dependent and needy adult children, then you are doing the right thing. Unfortunately, I see many parents who are doing the opposite which is ultimately creating a very lazy generation where they simply do not possess the life skills to survive out in the real world outside the comfort of their parents’ homes.

One of the biggest issues is that many parents are failing their children by overindulging their kids and handing everything to them without them working for anything. This is a huge mistake that often backfires in the long run. Parents complain that their adult children do not want to work or go out and get jobs. Well do you blame them? Why would they if they can get everything provided to them for free at home? It is essential that you teach your kids the value of building a strong worth ethic at an early age and understand the importance of developing a career that they love in order to be happy in life while also being able to create financial stability. If you buy your kids everything, then they get used to this way of life where they do not have to try or make any effort because everything is free at their disposal. So whenever they need something, as opposed to going out in the world to earn it, they are just going to expect that their parents will continue to provide everything for them. If this was a pattern that you fell into as a parent, then it is important to step up, establish boundaries, and BREAK THE CYCLE. Otherwise your kids are going to be adult children who mooch off of you forever which will not only eat a way at your retirement savings but also hinder your children from growing up and making something out of themselves.

It is incredibly sad to me to see so many young adults still depending on their family’s resources when they are fully capable of working and paying their own bills. That is why it is up to parents to make their children learn the value of money by making them learn how to earn it themselves and get them to pay for their own expenses when they are old enough to work. This prevents them from expecting free handouts all the time and pushes them to think outside the box and develop passions that will build into wealth over time. That is why it is necessary that parents TEACH the value behind hard work and set high expectations for their children so that they can thrive as adults.

Reality Vs. False Hope – It’s Time to Stop Living in La La Land

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While an abundance of positivity and hope are two wonderful things to possess as we all navigate our lives, there does come a point where too much positivity and hope can actually blind you from reality and hinder you from living your best life. Sometimes people become so hopeful of their future that this causes them to not really take action towards their goals because they believe they can manifest anything in existence without any effort. As I hope many of you realize–this is so FAR from reality and a life in total la la land! The Universe is powerful and has much to offer to everyone but I like to remind people that it is not a genie bottle where you put a wish out there and it just comes into fruition. There is still conscious intent and inner work that needs to take place in order to make things happen.

As hard as it is to face reality at times, no matter what–you should always opt to live in REALITY. When you live with false hope, you usually end up more disappointed, you can stunt your self growth, and it could impact your ego negatively in the long run. When you live in reality, at least you are building more resilience and essentially are embracing the TRUTH. As harsh as reality can be, it is better to live in real life versus a sugar coated version of life. I encourage everyone to be super real with self when it comes to your expectations, goals, and aspirations. From there, you can work towards everything that you want and then you will receive everything you desire (and probably even more). The Universe will reward you with your efforts and you will feel good in knowing that you created your abundant reality all by yourself!

Rejection Is Redirection – Learn to Embrace This New Direction

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Over the summer, I stumbled across a quote, “rejection is redirection.” I could not agree more with this quote! So often you see people react to rejection incredibly negatively. It can stir up emotions such as self doubt, frustration, depression, and basically put someone in a scarcity mindset. One starts to question, “What is wrong with me? Why am I a reject?” This is the wrong way to think! Rejection should never be taken as defeat. There are many ways to actually interpret rejection in a positive way such as: “The best is yet to come and something better is destined to manifest into my life.” “Let me look at this as a time to work on self improvement.”

If anything, rejection should serve as a MOTIVATING FACTOR to work harder at whatever it is that you want to achieve. It is not a time to give up on your goals or desires but to perhaps explore other options that will help you get to your end goal. If you decided to give up any time you failed at something or got rejected, you would never get ahead in life and would stay in a stagnant low place. You are also hindering yourself from self development by not investing the time that is needed to grow spiritually. So the next time you get rejected, accept it with grace and don’t feel bad about yourself. Look at this as an opportunity to improve your life and take the action that is needed to achieve your goals still–even if it takes you longer than you anticipated or means that you have to start over.

Relating back to the quote, sometimes rejection could also be a sign from the Universe that your goals need to shift and redirect in its entirety which might mean that new goals need to be established–and there is nothing wrong with that! Sometimes this is an inevitable reality and allows you to expand on other things you could achieve that you never had thought about previously. Remember that at the end of the day, under no circumstances should you let rejection get the best of you. There are often many silver linings in life and often rejection could lead to something much better in your life path even if you do not see that at the present moment. You have to continue to persevere and carry on with your life with a positive mindset.

My Thoughts on Botox and Aging – Is it Really Necessary?

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Aging can be a rather touchy subject as it is a question that many don’t like to be asked: “How old are you?” In your youth, you most likely didn’t think much about aging or care when people asked you that. Partially because when you are young, there is this feeling of invincibility. However, as you get older, you probably view life very differently and it can be a subject that you dread to talk about. The thing is, everything always comes down to your mindset and perception. As a society, we should not view aging as a bad thing. With age comes more wisdom and life experience which are both spiritually valuable things. We also have to remember that every year of life is a blessing and aging is just a part of the process. While it might not be the most physically desirable process, we should all feel blessed to have the opportunity of living a long life and prize longevity.

We live in a modern world where there are many ways to keep up with your appearances and still maintain a youthful look. There is also the freedom to do what makes us happy and make changes to our appearances if they serve as a confidence booster or make us feel good. When it comes to something like botox which is so readily available nowadays, while I don’t have an issue with it–I do think that people should not view wrinkles as a bad thing. It is totally natural and expected to happen with age. In addition, I also think people should really do their research and determine if it is worth doing after going through the pros and cons. Sometimes doing these types of facial procedures can actually make a person look worse and the person was better off not doing it to begin with. Instead of turning to botox, there definitely are more natural approaches to aging gracefully such as avoiding long periods of time in the sun or investing in natural skincare products that keep the skin smooth.

On the other hand, there are definitely situations where people do go far off the deep end with making dramatic physical changes to appear significantly younger. Again, I am not someone who wants to judge but I am someone who would want to examine why there is a need to go through drastic measures in order to feel good. People should really focus their energy in all their areas of life and not put the highest emphasis on their physical looks because looks do fade and that’s a part of life. There are better things to care about such as your achieving your life goals, pursuing your intrinsic passions, spending time with the people you care about, and other things that matter most to you personally.

Learn to Be Happy With Less – Here’s Why

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While I am someone who will always preach about the abundance of the Universe and how to attract abundance, I also want to teach a very simple and valuable lesson: Learn to be happy with less. That is not to say that you should deprive yourself of what life has to offer or to scale down your life goals. By all means, I think everyone should be striving for the best in life and not set any limitations. However, what I am saying is to actually take the time to enjoy the littlest of things and practice more gratitude for what you have achieved so far and what you currently have in life.

So often, you will see people compare themselves to others and be like, “Oh I am so jealous of that person for having that house” or “Why can’t I have a nicer car?” There is nothing wrong with feeling that way. There are ways to project this feeling into a more POSITIVE and happier mindset without feeling like you lack something. It is crucial to actually be thankful for what you currently possess at the present moment as opposed to complaining that you don’t have what you want right now. You will have plenty of time to also receive the same things from the Universe if you focus on these things consistently and your gratitude will actually attract more things into your life. It is also important to be HAPPY for others and their achievements. By seeing that others have certain things–instead of feeling jealous, it should be a reminder to self that if someone else is capable of having something then guess what–so are you and it is just a matter of time.

I think when you learn to be happy about the little things and without needing to have so much in order to create personal fulfillment, you bring an overall sense of joy into your life. Oftentimes, less is actually MORE and this is a good mindset to implement. This adds more meaning to the smaller things and then when bigger things are attracted into your life, you have an extra sense of gratitude because you weren’t necessarily expecting it or depending on these things.

Summer Recap and Back to Blogging Again!

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While I had every intention to start my blog again last week during the first week of September, sometimes life can get in the way and things don’t always go as planned. So here I am writing to you as we roll into the second week of September. While summer went very fast (as it always tends to do), it is good to get back into structured weekly blogging again. Before I begin to delve into any real serious topics, I thought it would be good to quickly share how my summer was.

The start of the summer for me included a family wedding in Connecticut which was a lot of fun as it is always nice to bring family together for a happy occasion. My social life is always a top priority during the summer months while I have more free time to actually have one. I got to see many friends including certain friends I had not seen for years.

Aside from an active social life, I also like to make travel a priority in my life because that is something that I have always intrinsically enjoyed and if I have the availability to travel, then I just make it happen! At the end of July, I got an opportunity to go to Portugal with my mom. In recent years, we have tried to make time for mother daughter vacations and decided upon Portugal as this was a country that neither of us had ever been to and had heard is a very beautiful place. It indeed was and I am so happy we got a chance to experience this!

Shortly after getting back from Portugal, my husband and I went on our first cruise together to Bermuda through Royal Caribbean. I hadn’t been on a cruise since I was a kid so I didn’t know what to expect as I know cruises had probably changed a lot since I last went. It was a short cruise, only 4 nights so we were only in Bermuda for a few hours. While it was a cool experience, my husband and I agreed that the ship was way too crowded and if we were to book another cruise again, we would look into booking one on a smaller ship. The ship itself also seemed a little dated to us so after it ended, it actually felt good to be back home again sleeping in our own bed!

I think that pretty much covers all the highlights of my summer! Thanks for reading!

It Is That Time of the Year…A Blog Vacation for Me This Summer :)

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The month of May always feels like a long month but I have to say that I cannot believe that it is the last week of May as I am typing this and that we are just days away from the start of June. This time of year, I like to take a break from blogging and go on what I call a “blog vacation” which gives me the opportunity to take a break from writing and open up my schedule a bit.

These past few months have been incredibly busy for me in terms of work and I have to admit that I could really use the free time now more than ever. Over the summer months, I hope to get back on track with a more regimented work out schedule, make more time to see friends/family, travel as much as I can, and continue to create fun memories with my husband. I cannot stress enough the importance of cherishing your quality time and to live your life in the present because the years go faster and faster every year.

(I might write here and there over the summer months with a pop up post but I will be taking a break from my daily blogs which are published once a week. I noticed in the past couple of months that I have picked up some new e-mail subscribers which is awesome! I hope you enjoy reading some of my previous content for the time being until I come back in the fall. As always, thanks for tuning in everyone and please thoroughly enjoy your summer! 🙂 )

The Best Time to Find Love In Your Life

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Love is a mystical human experience that connects two souls together. For some people, they might find love very early in life–perhaps in their teenage years and they manage to marry their high school sweethearts and live happily ever after. Maybe for someone else, it could take a second marriage before finding their true soulmate. It is important to understand that every single individual is on their own unique path in finding love. It can come easier for some more than others but there should not be a deadline in your mind as to when you find this person. The reason being is that you can easily make a wrong decision and end up settling for someone who wasn’t “the one.” You have to remember that every dating experience was just a part of the journey into leading you to finding your soulmate. So never be discouraged if you go through long periods without a partner or through horrible breakups along the way. This collection of experiences will ultimately lead you to the greater good of finding true love if that is something that you want to manifest in your life. The best time to find love as I mentioned will vary from person to person since everyone is carving out their own unique path but there are a few basic principles you can follow that will allow you to get to your end goal.

When You are In Love With YOURSELF – As basic as this may sound, it truly is essential for you to love yourself first above anything else. If you don’t love yourself, how do you expect someone to love you? You also cannot expect to seek validation from others in order to build more love for yourself because it truly needs to come from WITHIN. You need to find ways to accept and love yourself for both the good and the bad with a focus on all the GOOD things that you have to offer to the world.

When You are Not Really Looking – I know this can sound counterintuitive to many but it is amazing how love can find ways to find you when you are not proactively looking. The reason for this is that when you are too hungry for love, it can actually have the opposite effect and put into the Universe a needy vibration which naturally repels most people. When you are too desperate, you are thinking from a scarcity mindset where you need to cling onto any person who comes your way with the fear that you will not find anyone else. No one wants to feel that their significant other cannot function without them because this shows the person is too dependent on the person and on the relationship which is never healthy.

When Your Life Is Fabulous (With or Without Someone) – When you are living your very best life, you are giving the right vibrations into the Universe to attract love into your life. You are doing it naturally without any forced effort. This could mean that you are pursuing your passions, furthering your education, striving in your career, and/or surrounded by an amazing social circle of friends and family who adore you. People want to be with someone who is not only in a great place in their own lives but that will bring their lives UP–not down. If you are a broke bum living in your friend’s basement with a negative attitude about life and can’t get your $%^& together–no offense but why would someone naturally be interested in starting a relationship with you? You need to be very conscientious of your life decisions and create a clear path of intrinsic happiness. From there, you will notice that you will start attracting higher quality people into your life including potentially attracting your soulmate.

Financial Compatibility Matters – Why You Can’t Be Afraid to Discuss Your Financial Situation with Your Partner

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They say that one of the number one reasons why relationships fail is due to money matters. While many do not want to believe that, I can see how this can happen. It can be stressful enough making and managing your own money. Then factor in your partner’s money habits which can either make your life more stressful or potentially easier. Let’s also forget that money does NOT buy you happiness. Sure, maybe it can make your life easier and there is more financial security but money does not buy a happy relationship. It is for this reason that it is important to recognize that being with someone who has a lot of money does not necessarily guarantee a lifetime of bliss with this person because at the end of the day, you want to find someone who you love unconditionally–with or without a big bank account. There is also a reason that there is the saying, “more money, more problems.” When someone is rich, with that comes more financial responsibilities and also the risk of mismanaging their wealth which could mean being in a ton of debt later in life. On the opposite extreme, being with someone who is a broke bum can understandably bring upon added stress to your life. It can also be an extremely sensitive subject to discuss because you do not want this person to feel even worse about their financial situation. So is it important to still talk about finances and is there a safe way to approach it appropriately?

The short answer is: YES, of course it is important to talk about money in your personal relationships! I can understand why people do not want to because you may feel that it is not your right to know but if you eventually plan to buy a home together, pay joint bills, and essentially merge your adult lives together–then having some money conversations are absolutely needed if you want to build a strong financial foundation together and to ensure you both see eye-to-eye when it comes to money. So often, you see one person who is a great saver and then someone who cannot save a dollar if their life depended on it. This can cause a lot of arguments and tension if you have two people who simply do not agree on how their money is spent. Looking at it from both points of view, does the saver want the spender to spend all their money? Does the spender want to feel deprived and that the saver is constantly controlling their money? These are things that couples really need to think about. From personal experience, I have dated people who were bad with their money and did not know how to save. Over time, it got very annoying and although that was never the definitive reason as to why I would break up the relationship, this was something that was always a consideration because I did not want to be with someone who had zero discipline when it came to saving their money and did not prioritize their financial future.

There are a few safe ways to approach the subject without necessarily bringing it up directly right away. For starters, observe your partner’s behaviors when it comes to money. Is this person very frugal when they order food from a restaurant or does this person like to order everything from the menu? What are things that this person likes to spend money on–is it a daily coffee, vacations, material goods, and/or spending categories? Does this person talk about money goals such as paying off their student debt, saving up for enough money for a house, etc.? There are many things you can observe without asking.

As time goes by within your relationship and you get to know each other better, it is okay to open up the conversation and to talk about each other’s personal finances. It is better to be open and upfront than for it to be a guessing game or to feel like you can’t talk about these things. People should not be afraid to be open and honest, even when it comes to their financial situation. It will either bring two people closer together or further apart. If it does end up being a conflict within the relationship, it is much better to know now and to break it off rather than to stay and then find out when it is too late that the two of you are not financially compatible.

Why Some People Take Things More Personally Than Others

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While personalities vary and some people are potentially born more sensitive than others, there are other factors that can contribute to a person’s sensitivity level. Those factors include both life experiences and a person’s environment. Think about it, if someone grows up living in a bubble where they are never given consequences for their behaviors or told that they are great at everything with minimal effort–then any little insult or negative comment is going to hurt them because they were never exposed to adversity or hardships. On the other hand, if you have someone who has experienced more rejections in life or had a tougher living situation, this person is going to have a thicker skin and become mentally stronger over time. Maybe initially, they might feel weak, hurt, and extra sensitive but they tend to overcome these negative feelings because they are forced to cope and persevere.

Remember that it is always much more rewarding to have to work harder at things, to experience failures, to not be living a cushy life where everything is handed to you, and to embrace any challenges that come along the way because you are developing a stronger mindset and therefore will not take things as personally. It is okay to feel sensitive from time to time but ultimately, it is best to know how to adapt and learn how to regulate your emotions. The ability to self monitor your emotions is a life skill that needs to be developed and ideally it is something that should be taught as early as early childhood. Keep in mind that this is a skill that can improve throughout the course of your lifetime and it is never too late to consciously make the effort to become more mentally tough.