It is very common to see people try to change others, whether it be a significant other, a family member, or friend. The truth of the matter is, the person is never going to change if they do not want to change. Sometimes people might go through the motions of trying to change to make the other person happy but usually those changes are temporary and are not authentic to the individual which is why the changes are not permanent. It is for this reason why I do not believe that you can change others but at the very least, you can positively impact others as an alternative. By that, I mean that you can try to be a good influence on someone and over time, the other person might be motivated to change–for themselves and not because you pressured them to.
I find the best way to influence others is to practice what you preach and to lead by example. If you have good habits, it is natural for the other person to want to emulate you which is a good thing. It could take time and as I mentioned, it is ultimately up to the other person to want to change at the end of the day. It is important to understand that even with your very best efforts to promote change and your unlimited support, the other person might never change. If this is the reality, then it is up to you to accept the person as is or depending on the situation, it might be best to reject the person altogether–as harsh as that sounds.
If you find that the other person has qualities that you desperately want to change and these changes are simply not feasible, it is okay to remove this person from your life. I say that because it is not worth spending time with someone who has many qualities that you find undesirable. As they say, “birds of a feather flock together” which is why it is best to surround yourself around others who are like minded like yourself in which you would not find a need to change the other person to begin with.
Happy 2/22/22! How cool is it that today’s date is all consecutive numbers? This rarely happens and it is worth pointing out as I would label it a lucky day. It also is somewhat ironic that it’s a Tuesday or “twos day.” For me personally, 22 has always been a lucky number and so it feels especially lucky that today is February 22, 2022.
So are certain dates luckier than others?
Whether or not you have “lucky” numbers or positive associations to certain numbers, I think that if you do, then those dates will consciously feel luckier to you–regardless of what the day brings. It is more so for fun to have lucky numbers. By that, I mean that you can generate your own luck on a daily basis and that you do not need to rely on specific days to be lucky in order to experience any luck or abundance of joy.
Regardless of your personal views on whether or not some numbers are luckier than others, I hope that 2/22/22 is a great day for you! I am going to keep this post short and sweet and enjoy this day as it feels special to me! 🙂
I can tell a lot about a person’s self confidence level based on their dating choices. When someone tells me that they are with someone who neglects, cheats, and/or shares with me instances of any other extreme form of disrespect–this illustrates to me that this person does not have enough self love or thinks very highly of self.Why? When people possess a high level of self confidence and loves self, then you will find that they are not in these unhealthy relationships or bad situations to begin with. They are able to put themselves FIRST and foremost before their significant other with ease and will opt to find their very best match as opposed to dating someone who doesn’t meet their standards. They also do not have a tolerance for bad behavior or any signs of mistreatment and are ready to walk away altogether whenever they see any reoccurring red flag in a relationship.
If you find yourself in a situation where you are unhappy with your partner, it is important to dig deep and determine the reasons why you feel that way while also taking the time to look from within and examine your own level of self love. If you feel down about yourself, it might not be the best time in your life to be in a relationship. The reason being that you need to love self and be your best self before pursuing dating on a serious level. If you can work on yourself, not only are you benefiting your very best asset (that’s you) but you are also setting yourself up for attracting a desirable partner whom you can offer your best while also receiving the best in return. It is a win/win situation on both sides and the foundation of a fulfilling and rewarding relationship when you have two people who equally feel confident about themselves along with the overall success of their relationship.
What people need to realize is that rejection is a part of life and that it does not have to be as horrible as you perceive it to be if you know how to react, cope, and become a stronger individual from it. Many people feel defeated by rejection and some even suffer from a bruised ego for a long period of time. What if I told you that rejection can be a GOOD thing and that you can become a better person from experiencing it?
First and foremost, the first thing you need to realize is that you are going to be okay after being faced with rejection. You might temporarily feel bad about yourself or the situation at hand but that feeling will go away over time. If you tell yourself that it was not meant to be at this stage of your life and that a better opportunity will come your way, you will be much more motivated to find it and to feel good again! This is the right mindset to possess because it shows that you are accepting of the outcome and know that rejection is not the end of the world because there are much more opportunities out there just waiting to be taken.
This leads me to my next point that it is extremely important to realize that for every door that closes, there are plenty of doors that are ready to be opened. Meaning that you cannot feel upset over a single rejection or perhaps a series of them because the Universe is full of abundance all around you and it is up to you to go out there and explore what opportunities await you. Even if there have been a series of rejections along the way up to this point in your life, there are an unlimited amount of opportunities that are on the horizon in your life’s path in which you will not be rejected. Remember that you are destined to receive everything that you want and more as long as you do not give up and you put yourself out there. If you choose to do nothing and let rejection get the best of you, then that’s on you. The Universe has a lot to give but you need to put in a high level of energy and effort in order to receive.
If you get rejected from a job, relationship, college, or something that holds meaning to you such as a sport or other hobby, take this as an opportunity to ask yourself, “How can I do better moving forward? What can I do to make self improvements?” This is not only beneficial in heightening your own self development but it is also a crucial step in elevating your future. Think about it, if you get rejected from making a sports team, the question to the coach should be, “What can I do to improve my skill set and be a better player?” This should not be a time to feel bad about yourself–it is the time to feel motivated to be the best that you can be and actually take the time that is needed to improve. If people never got rejected, there would be no room for improvement. It is for this reason that you should look at rejection as a golden opportunity for change and not as an attack against your personal character.
While many people choose to be in a relationship or prefer to have a partner, it is natural to go through phases in life where you are single for long periods of time or you might have recently gotten out of a relationship. Some people feel bad about a failed relationship and/or might possess a deep feeling of loneliness from their single status. However, this does not have to be the case and no one should feel lesser of a person because of it. It is possible to be single and not be bothered by it–heck, there are even those who are happily single and choose to live this way. While that might seem like an oxymoron to some, it can actually be a positive thing to be single. How does one feel good about being single and what are the benefits?
Do What You Want on Your Terms – It is liberating to be able to do what you want and not have limitations. When you are in a relationship, sometimes you are not able to do what you want and you might find that you do not have as much free time as you use to have. Typically, you also have to check in with your partner before doing something whereas when you are single, you are a free agent.
Focus on Self Development – Although you should always be working on self development whether or not you are in a relationship, it is definitely easier to focus on yourself when you are by yourself. Again, it comes down to having more personal time which you can utilize to better yourself. This is also to your benefit because when you are at your best, this elevates your confidence while building your attraction level which ultimately will increase the likelihood of finding an equally high quality match when you are ready to.
Spent More Quality Time With Friends/Family – I find that many people who are in a relationship do not make time for their friends and family as they used to previously. While some people are good at finding that balance, many end up spending more time with their significant other and abandoning their friends and family. When you are single, this gives you the opportunity to still make quality time for other people other than the person you are with.
Final Note – It is natural for people to want to be in a relationship but remember that it is totally acceptable to be single too. It is way better to be single than to be in a relationship for the sake of it or to settle on a relationship that does not suit your best interests. Too often I see people stay in bad relationships because of this underlying need of being with someone (aka anyone) and out of the fear of loneliness. You are far more superior than that so stop settling! It is always best to stay single and wait for the right person to come into your life than to stay in an invaluable relationship.
Success often comes down to having the right mindset and developed habits along with taking consistent action to ensure results. While many might have their best intentions set to be successful at something or to achieve a goal, not everyone is able to follow through. I think there are various reasons for this and if one takes the time to examine the underlying issue that is setting them them back from success, one can fix the problem and work on overcoming these obstacles.
People Don’t Know Specifically What They Want – For many, people don’t think about what they truly want in their lifetime and just live day by day without looking at brightening their future. People might be able to make general claims such as wanting to be rich, healthy, successful, etc; however, that is not specific enough. My question would be, “Well what does success mean to you? How do you define it for yourself personally?”
Solution: This is where it is helpful to dig deep and mentally map out everything that you want and define every little detail. Even if your definition of success seems very far from your current reality, that is okay! At least you have a concrete vision of what you want and from there, you can create a plan to fulfill this vision.
People Don’t Want Things Bad Enough – There are people who claim they want something but then do absolutely nothing about it. If someone is not doing much about it, my immediate thought is that this person does not want it bad enough because if they did, they would make some changes and the sacrifices needed to reach their end goal.
Solution: Again, this is why it is important to define exactly what you want, not just semi want. If you are not too passionate about something, then you need to find something that you authentically care about. As a result, you will find that you are more motivated to manifest your desires when it is actually something that you want bad enough.
People Don’t Know Where to Start and End Up No Where – Many people are afraid to start something new or simply don’t know where to start to get to where they want to be. When people feel hopeless and stuck, they tend to do nothing at all meaning that they stay stagnant and never progress in life.
Solution: The truth of the matter is, many worthwhile things in life take time and it is not going to happen overnight. Knowing this, the solution is to take baby steps because every little action you take is going to get you closer to achieving your goals. Remember that moving towards something is better than not moving at all.
Not everyone has high health standards and the way in which one chooses to live life can be radically different from individual to individual. It is quite common to see two people in a relationship that might have the intention to stay healthy and fit but over time, one or both might start to let themselves go due to lack of motivation, a busy work schedule, stress, or simply just out of the comfort of being in a steady relationship. Whatever the reason may be, you have to remember that it is really up to the other individual to want to stay healthy more so than what their partner says. So keep in mind, even if you want a loved one to change, if the other person is content with their current health habits or lack there of, there never will be a change.So knowing this, is it worth asking your partner to live a healthier lifestyle or to do something about their weight?
I think the subject of weight in general is an extremely touchy subject. People tend to be concerned with either being too overweight or being too underweight. While most are probably more concerned if their partner gains excessive weight, there is also the opposite spectrum where someone is losing too much weight such as an eating disorder which is just as detrimental as being overweight. The best thing to do is to positively encourage your partner to make better health choices. If you approach your partner in a loving and supportive way, then there is a much higher chance that the person will at least be receptive to making a change. If you were to attack your partner and tell them that they have a weight problem, this is not going to be very successful because putting anyone down in a negative tone is not really going to accomplish anything and could also potentially cause a rift on your overall relationship. In addition, it is going to make the person feel worse about themselves and this might have the opposite effect where they feel hopeless and the problem gets even worse.
Besides providing support to your partner, another good way to gently encourage your partner to make healthier choices is to lead by example. If you can demonstrate that you are conscientious about your diet and exercise habits, then this gives the other person the opportunity to follow your lead. If you can also make being healthy and fit a priority to focus on together, then this also makes it easier for the other person to adapt. This can mean food shopping together and cooking nutritious meals together. Another idea is to schedule working out on the same days so that you can create quality time together while being fit at the same time.
At the end of the day, people are going to make their own personal choices in life and this applies to diet and exercise as well. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water but it is up to the horse to want to drink it. If you are going to go out of your way to try to get your partner to adjust their health habits or to make any positive change, remember that a loving and supportive approach is the way to go.
It is natural to care about your looks and your outward appearance. I think this can be a good thing as long as you also possess a healthy mindset to match your positive self image. Unfortunately, there are many people who have a negative perception of self which would allow for them to go through extreme measures to “look good.” For example, both women and men get fixated on certain things that might not be within their control such as their height, facial features, and body composition. Personally, it is mind blowing to me that people would want to get surgeries to totally change their face or change parts of their body that take away from their natural born identity. I am not saying that to put down anyone who has made that choice because to each their own and whatever makes someone feel happy about self; however, the majority of the time, I just do not think it is necessary. Think about it, no one should feel the need to take a drastic approach in altering themselves physically–especially if it is unsafe and can cause potential health risks down the line in order to look and feel good.So what can be done to love your self image that won’t require a major transformation?
Focus on Your Best Features – It is very easy for people to focus on what they lack but it is most important to shift that focus onto what one already does have. I believe everyone has attractive attributes and what you perceive as unattractive can actually be a complete turn on to someone else. Rather than comparing self to others and trying to fit into a mold of what society’s definition of “beauty” is, it is best to work with what you were born with and to maximize what you already have. Trust me, EVERYONE has something attractive about themselves if they choose to recognize it and fixate on it rather than thinking about what they do not like or what they think is “missing.”
Develop Your Own Unique Sense of Style – You do not need to be the most naturally good looking person in the world to have a great sense of style. This is also something that can change and evolve over time. Areas of style can include your choice of clothing, hairstyle, makeup, jewelry, accessories, etc. Everyone has the potential to be stylish or at the very least develop a style that works for you and enhances your best features. While it is helpful to keep an eye out on the latest trends, remember that trends come and go so it is better to determine your very own individual style that is true to yourself.
Work on Building Self Love From the Inside Out – It is important to realize that looks are not everything. Having a beautiful exterior does not mean much if a person has low self esteem and has an endless amount of internal issues. Sometimes the most generically attractive people in the world have the most problems and feel the worst about themselves. This leads me to my final point that it is essential to always be working on self development and to find ways to increase confidence on the inside as opposed to just putting all your energy into feeling good on the outside. When you genuinely feel great about yourself, it truly does radiate from the inside out which should always be the end goal.