Trust Issues – Understanding Where They Come From and Can They Be Fixed?

When it comes to trust, you will find there are people who trust very easily or those who do not in which they can easily be classified as people with “trust issues.” A person who is labeled this way typically possesses a deep fear of betrayal, abandonment, manipulation, or perhaps may even have trouble developing an emotional attachment because of their trust issues. When you are faced with someone with trust issues, chances are the person will bring them up or find a way of accusing you of things on a regular basis (or enough for you to notice it) even when you have not done anything to give them a reason that you cannot be trusted. That might make you wonder, “What am I doing to cause this?” when usually it is not personal to you and it is an internal issue on behalf of the other person.

There are various reasons to explain why someone will develop this whereas someone else will not. The explanation can be very complicated but usually stems from these causes:

Negative Experience From Their Past – Usually if someone was badly burned from a previous relationship (ex: lying, cheating, etc.), then the person will always have in the back of their mind that it can happen again even if they are with a totally different person.

Bad Childhood – No one’s childhood is perfect but if there were abandonment issues or perhaps distrust from one’s own family, this can heavily impact someone to develop trust issues at a very young age.

Insecurity – Insecurity is a separate issue in and of itself but can very much correlate with having a lack of trust. Someone who constantly feels insecure within themselves will always feel as though their partner can easily leave them for someone else or just be extra paranoid someone is going to betray them in some way due to not feeling they are not worthy enough of being treated well.

Poor Character (Cannot Be Trusted) – People who have the biggest trust issues are often times people who cannot be trusted themselves. In other words, if they believe someone will cheat on them, it could be because they have cheated before and/or continue to do it so they assume others behave the way they do.

Do trust issues ever go away? Can they be fixed? I think that for some, with the right amount of time and conscious effort to fix them, they can be fixed but it probably will not be an overnight process. For most, I do not see it as something that will go away in its entirety but again, if there is a focus to work on the issue, then it can definitely go away. It might also be wise to consider seeking a professional therapist who can assist in figuring out ways to cope and how to let go of the past. Remember, it is never too late to make a positive change in your life as long as you want it and are willing to work towards it!

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