A friend had asked me a few days ago, “Do you miss any of your exes and wish you could go back to any of them?” Without a hint of hesitation, my response was, “Absolutely, NOT.” Does this make me a cold hearted individual? No, not at all. I look at it like this: The past needs to stay in the past. Life should be progressing forward. In order to spiritually grow and create a brighter future for yourself, the ship needs to sail to a new destination (in this case, a new relationship or happily single to work on yourself also applies here too).

You can still appreciate what the relationship brought to you at that moment and I encourage you to do so. With the good times, there were also life lessons. I never regret any of my previous relationships because that is what the Universe attracted into my life during that time and even though it did not last forever, it still served a purpose. No matter the duration, I never look at it as “wasted time” and no one should ever view it that way. Do you look at your previous jobs as wasted time if you did not stay at one company the entire time? No, of course not because this is what you choose to be a part of your life experience and most people explore multiple job opportunities within their career path.

Relationships shape you as an individual but they also prepare you for someone even better. Yes, you heard me. Your future is going to be far more superior than your past. In order for that scenario to play out, you need to believe that with every ounce of your soul (not just because I said you so) along with taking the ACTION needed to make that happen for yourself. This means completely letting go of your past without leaving any open doors for an ex to creep back in–unfortunately, we all know there are many desperate and needy people out there who try to knock on the door for another chance. This also means having the mental strength to not want to revisit the past either. In other words, it goes both ways. You have to shut the door but you also have to have the burning desire to want to start over with a clean slate. If you are despairingly in search of finding a new partner simply to replace your ex when your mind is still not over the last person you dated, then you clearly have not taken the definitive action that is needed to clear your past.

Whether you broke it off or they did or maybe it was mutual, cut your losses and move on with your life. Trust me, it is for the greater good for everyone because each person can grow from the experience and move onto a new life path. Personally, I find it exciting to know what the future will bring than to ever even consider pursuing a failed relationship. If it did not work out the first time, what is the point in going back? For security? Convenience? Comfort? Lack of belief that there is a better suited match? People tend to go back for the wrong reasons, settle for less than they deserve, and/or stay attached to a false hope that they will reunite with an ex. In certain situations, I think there is room for optimism but the majority of time, it just isn’t worth it. Remember, as I often like to quote from Frank Sinatra’s famous song title, “The best is yet to come.” You just have not experienced it just yet but keep your mind open to the possibilities because the Universe will make it happen (this does not only apply to love, it applies to everything in life!)–Trust the process and you shall receive its greatest gifts! 😉